Keep Holding On
by teamjacobrulez
Summary: He had helped her move on. He had taught her to love again. He had been the one to fix her broken heart. But now, he is going to be the one to tear her apart. VERY ANGSTY. Jacob/Bella Non-Imprint. HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!
1. My Sun

**MUST READ (Introduction): I'm telling you guys now that this story will be ANGSTY. I've always wanted to try my hand at writing an angsty story and this is what I had come up with. So for future reference, please don't complain about how I'm cruel, heartless, and blah blah blah. From beginning to the end, this story will be FULL OF ANGST. **

**Also, Jacob DOES NOT imprint on Bella at any point of this story. Nope. Not at all. You'll see where I'm going with this as it progresses.**

**I "think" that the story line of this story is pretty original. I've read so many Jacob/Bella stories on fanfiction already and I've never come across a story line like this one before... well, yet. If you happen to read something a lot like this story line, then tell me so I can remove my claim on it being original :D**

**I'm also telling you now, that the twist of this story is so UNBELIEVABLE that you may want to kill me. Yes, it's that bad. Trust me, Bella is going to suffer a whole lot in this story. Jacob, on the other hand, hmm, you'll see. In most of my stories, I make the Cullens bad guys. Oh yes, I do :) But in this story, there will be no Edward bashing and the Cullens will actually take part in Bella's healing process. **

**Wait, healing process? Hmm, I just gave you guys a clue there :D**

**And... HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO ME! This is my gift to you guys and myself for a whole year of being a member and part of fanfiction. There are so many of you that have been with me ever since I made my first story, this is for you guys! I could have never gotten where I am now without all of you. I love you guys!  
**

**Without further adieu, I introduce to you Keep Holding On!  
**

Summary: He had helped her move on. He had taught her to love again. He had been the one to fix her broken heart. But now, he is going to be the one to tear her apart.

_"The thing about the sun is it's always there. Like sometimes, you can't see it, but it  
never really goes away. I'll always be here for you too, Bella. I'll never go away"_

_- Jacob Black  
_

Chapter 1: My Sun

**Bella POV**

Edward left me. I'm alone, cold, and unloved.

Not willing to live, I stayed on the frozen dirt floor unmoving. I let out a small whimper from my small, blue lips. I closed my eyes shut, enjoying the feeling of pain. It's the only thing that made me remember how much I love him, how much I _need_ him. It's the only thing that allowed me to know that he was _real._

My mind flashed back to all the times he told me that he loved me. How I wish that I had known that they were only lies. _He shouldn't have left me! He loves me!_ Those words were far from the truth and I knew it. They are now only hopes that I know will never be fulfilled. He had said it himself. _I don't love you._

For the first time since _he_ left, I allowed the sobs to escape me. I cried for Edward, for Charlie, and for myself. I shrieked in pain of it all, clutching at my chest. I wrapped my arms around my stomach as I tried to prevent the bile that threatened to crawl up back my throat. "Why?" I shouted up into the sky. "Why?" I repeated, this time in a hushed tone.

I could feel myself losing consciousness. I fought to keep my eyes open. If I'm going to die, I want to be awake for it. I don't want to take the risk of forgetting all that has happened to me.

The cold, breezy air was wrapping itself around my body, suffocating the air from my lungs.

"Bella!" I heard someone shout from a great distance. I opened my mouth to tell them to go away, but all that came out was a shaky whimper. _I want to die! Leave me be!_ "Bella!" I heard again, this time the voice was much closer.

"D-d-don't," I managed to get out in a stutter.

"Oh Bella," the voice whispered with sadness in its voice. _I don't want your pity! I want to die!_ I felt myself being lifted into the arms of a strong man. I clutched his chest, hoping that I could possibly hurt him. "You're only hurting yourself," he told me.

"W-who are y-you?" I stuttered once again. The cold had managed to numb my body, not allowing myself to feel anything physical.

"I am Samuel Uley. Your father called for a search team for you and I'm the leader of it. We have been looking for you for hours. What happened to you?" he asked with slight anger in his voice. I shied away from his question. I didn't want to relive what had happened to me.

"No," I refused.

"We can't help you if you don't tell us what happened," he sighed. _Why do you care? __They__ didn't care! Why should you?_

"I didn't want your help," I snapped, my voice now stronger. "I wanted to die and I still want to die. You should have just left me there to die!" I shouted at him. I looked up and saw anger and frustration flash across his eyes.

"And what about Charlie? Are you so selfish that you don't care about how he would feel?" he shot at me, at a dangerously controlled, calm voice. I could sense the viciousness behind his tone. Suddenly, guilt flashed through my body and I let out a loud, heartbreaking scream. _Charlie! Oh Charlie, how could I have forgotten about you!_ "Shit Bella," Sam panicked.

"I'm fine. I just – " I didn't have any more strength in me to finish my sentence.

"He really messed you up, didn't he?" he whispered wretchedly. _No!_

"Don't speak of him!" I shrieked. My chest heaved up and down, my heart beating erratically beneath it. Pain threatened to crawl through my heart once again. _I have had enough!_

"Bella!" I heard the familiar voice of my father yell.

"She's alright," Sam assured him. _No, I am not. I'm broken, cold, and unwanted._ Sam transferred me into the arms of my dad.

"Bells," my dad whispered in a heartbreaking tone. "Thank you Sam. I owe you my life," he pledged to the man who had saved me. I curled into my father's embrace, holding onto his shirt for dear life. _Don't leave me too! Please!_

"It was no trouble Chief. I was only doing my job," Sam nodded. _I knew he didn't care! No one does!_

"What happened to my sweet, little daughter?" my dad murmured to himself. I heard his shoes clang against the wooden stairs of our home. He laid me gently on my bed and brushed the offending hair from my face. "Honey," he whispered.

He was about to pull away but I grabbed onto his neck. "No! Please don't leave me too! Please!" I pleaded, as I sobbed in fear.

"I would never leave you Bella! Never," he promised me. He laid on the bed with me and wrapped his arms around me. I cried for hours into his shirt. "Shhh," he hushed softly. I curled into his body and buried my head in his chest. "I love you Bella," he whispered lovingly.

"I love you too dad," I replied in a raspy voice. My throat was hurting from all the screams and sobs that shook throughout my body. He gently rubbed my back soothingly and I don't know how, but I found it in myself to willingly dip into the dark abyss.

_I ran and ran, not allowing myself to stop. I was barefoot and the twigs and branches on the ground had cut me deeply. Trees and shrubs came to me as nothing but flashes of brown and green. "Edward!" I shouted through the forest. "Please don't do this!" I pleaded._

_I came to a stop as I saw him standing under a ray of sunlight. He stood magnificently. His skin sparkled like diamonds and he gave me the crooked smile that I loved. Suddenly, he wasn't what he was before. His eyes shone in a dark red color and his smile turned into a vicious hiss. _

"_I. Don't. Love. You," he growled, emphasizing each word. I thrashed and screamed. _

"_Edward!" I shrieked._

I jumped up from my bed and breathed heavily. Sweat covered my whole body. I realized that it had only been a dream. I looked to my side and saw that my dad was no longer there. _No, no, no! He can't have left me too!_

"Dad!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, before falling into a fit of cries. I grabbed my pillow and threw it across the room. Soon enough, my bedroom door slammed open.

"Bella!" my dad shouted quickly in worry. His hair was disheveled and his eyes were blood shot red. I jumped off of the bed and threw myself into his arms.

"I thought you left me too," I cried into his shirt. He cupped my cheeks and forced me to look into his eyes.

"I promised you that I would never leave you Bella and I intend to keep that promise," he said firmly. I nodded, allowing the tears to flow freely down my cheeks. "Let's get you back to sleep," he added. He laid us together in the bed and kept me by his side. "I also promise to kill that bastard who did this to you," he whispered angrily.

* * *

I stared out the window. I saw children playing in their front porches, women gardening their yards, and couples swinging down the road happily. I hated them. I _envied_ them. For months, I've done nothing but wallow in my room as I watched the lives of other people. Their _happy_ lives. They didn't have a care in the world. They lived. They laughed. They smiled. They were _whole, _as I was not.

I heard the small creak of my bedroom door, but I didn't mind it. "Bella, this had gone on for too long," my dad stated. "I'm sending you back to Florida," he added forlornly.

My eyes widened in fear, realization hitting me like a lightning bolt. "No! I won't let you! I want to stay here!" I shouted at him. His eyes sparkled with tears.

"Your mom and I have been so worried for you. You hardly eat anymore. You don't go anywhere but school and even then you aren't talking to your friends. Your grades have been dropping. I'm _so_ worried," he whispered heartbreakingly.

"I'll do whatever you want. Just, please!" I begged him. He nodded slowly.

"First, I want you to eat and you better eat a lot," he commanded. I nodded. Second, I want you to go out, be with your friends, and have fun. I don't like that all you ever do nowadays is mope around," he said sadly, "Lastly, your grades need to improve. Senior year is fast and approaching. You can't get to a good college without good grades." I also nodded at his last demands. _There's no point in going to college if there isn't even any point to my life._

"I'm sorry dad," I whispered as I went over to him to give him a hug. _I really am sorry._

"Let's go somewhere to eat," he announced. I nodded. We sat in the cruiser and drove around in a comfortable silence. I realized that we had passed by a sign that said we were now entering La Push. And just like that memories flashed through my eyes.

"_So they're like vampires or something?" I joked to Jacob. He laughed and gave me a warm smile. I liked the way he made me feel. It was almost as if I was as light as a feather._

"_That's what everyone in the Rez thinks, but you don't have to worry about that Bella. They're only stories," he pointed out. I chuckled and nodded at him._

"_I hope so"_

I clutched my stomach. "Where are we going?" I asked in a pained voice.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

"Just answer my question," I replied harshly. I gulped audibly realizing what I had just done. "I'm sorry," I apologized.

"It's alright," he assured, though I could sense the shock in his voice. "Billy invited us for dinner at his house. If that's alright," he replied.

"It's alright," I agreed. Maybe being with Jacob could help me forget about Ed – _him_, for now. Charlie parked on the dirt floor in front of the Black's house. We got out of the car and walked up the front steps. I heard the squeals of wheels on wood. _Ahh, it must be Billy._

"Hey old man," Charlie joked.

"Who are you calling old?" Billy retorted. They both laughed but Billy abruptly stopped as his eyes landed on me. "Bella, it's nice to see you," he said warmly.

"Likewise Billy," I managed to give him the best smile I could, though it was not much. Sadness flashed through his face but he quickly covered it up. _Too late._

"Jacob's in the garage. Would you mind calling him up for dinner?" he asked.

"No problem," I shook my head. I took a deep breath and walked over to the small hut that was placed beside the house. As I neared it, I heard labored breathing and the sounds of metal against metal. "Hey Jake!" I greeted, way too loudly even for my own liking.

A loud bump attracted my attention. "Shit," he cursed rubbing his forehead.

For the first time in six months, I laughed.

**So, how'd you like the first chapter? Angsty, huh? Told you so :D**

**Don't worry, the story gets more interesting in the next few chapters.  
**

**Another WARNING: the first maybe 15 chapters (?) or so will be very FAST PACED. Meaning, in between chapters, it may skip a couple days, a week, two weeks, one month, etc. You get the idea, right? I'm trying to build a background between Jacob and Bella before I get right into the main plot of the story. So, yeah :)**

**YES, this story ends happily! So, no worries :]  
**

**Please put this story on STORY ALERT and keep updated!**

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	2. Not Okay

**I've already received many questions, so I'll answer the most asked questions:**

**Will it be angsty all through-out?**

**Yes, and no. I mean, not EVERY chapter is going to be angsty, but yes, this story will be full of angst.**

**Will there be a happy ending?**

**Of course! But... Jacob and Bella will struggle A LOT before they can be happy together.**

**Why are there two kids on the banner for this story?**

**That, my friends, I cannot answer. I guess you'll just have to stay tuned and keep updated.**

**And here is Chapter 2! ENJOY :)  
**

Chapter 2: Not Okay

**Bella POV**

I laughed like a stupid maniac. Jacob had a sheepish smile plastered onto his face. "I'm sorry. Did I scare you?" I managed to joke. _Joke? I didn't think I even had the capability to joke anymore._

"Me? Scared? No way! I was just surprised," he defended quickly. His eyes roamed my form and suddenly his eyes fell into sadness. _Please, not you too._ "What happened to you Bella?" he asked softly.

"I- I don't want to talk about it," I stuttered quietly. He nodded in understanding.

"So what did you need?" he asked in a more upbeat tone. _That's what I like about him. He has the ability to be happy all the time._

"Your dad told me to call you up for dinner. Hence, why I'm here," I replied.

"Sure, let me just finish down here," he complied. He hovered over the hood of a car. I walked over to it and ran my fingertips of the piece of metal.

"I see you got your car," I mused. _The one he had always wanted._

"Yeah, the twenty dollars that my dad gave me was worth it after all," he chuckled. I froze suddenly.

"_Why are you here?" I asked him. I sat outside of the prom as I waited for Edward to come back. Jacob had just appeared out of thin air._

"_This'll sound so stupid but my dad gave me twenty dollars to warn you about Cullen," he groaned with a somewhat of a serious expression on his face._

"_Do you need the money that badly?" I teased._

"_Yeah," he grinned, "It's going towards my car."_

"Oh crap. Shit Bella. I didn't mean to – I hadn't meant to… I'm sorry," he apologized as he quickly stood by me in comfort.

"You don't have to be sorry Jake. This is just me being my broken self," I spat bitterly towards myself. _If I just wasn't so stupid!_

"Hey, don't you dare blame yourself for anything," he grounded out. I looked up and locked eyes with his intense brown eyes. "You don't deserve this. No one ever does," he assured me with anger in his voice. I gave a small nod and managed to prevent the tears to fall again.

"Let's go eat," I quickly changed the subject. He agreed and wiped his hands on a towel, taking off the grease off of his hands.

"I'm glad you came by today Bells," he smiled softly at me.

"Me too," I whispered back.

We walked back inside the house and ate dinner. The table was hardly silent at all. Charlie and Billy kept going at it, teasing each other relentlessly. Surprisingly, I had found it in myself to laugh every now and then. I saw the look that Charlie had passed me one time. He was _happy._

"Thanks for the dinner Billy," my dad thanked.

"Don't worry about it. We don't get much company," Billy grinned. "You guys wanna stay for a while? There's a Mariners game tonight," he wiggled his eyes suggestively. My dad had a longing look in his eyes as he turned to me.

"Bells?" he asked hopefully.

"We'd be delighted," I agreed with a soft, but forced, smile. I could tell that Billy saw passed through it.

"Great!" he exclaimed.

"You wanna hang in the garage?" Jake asked as our dads got comfortable around the living room. I nodded and followed him back out.

"How's the car going?" I asked, trying to make small talk.

"I've done all I could for now. If you hadn't noticed, I got that car in scraps. I'm going to need a lot of parts to repair it and those parts don't come cheap," he answered with a hint of sadness behind his voice. _Cars are truly his passion._

"I'm sorry," I empathized.

"It's alright. The car is going to be a lot of hard work but once I get it all fixed up, it will be worth every single second of patience," he smiled at me. _Something about his statement makes me think that there's much more behind his words._

I walked over to the small, worn out couch and watched in awe as Jacob continued to work on the car. I saw how much love and care he put into working on it. He would gently clean any sort of grease that appeared on the car and the way his eyes lit up whenever everything went the way he wanted it to melted my heart.

My eyes widened. _No._ _Not again._

"Are you doing okay?" I asked, wanting to shake myself from my thoughts.

"How about you? Are you sure I'm not boring you to death over there?" he teased. _Quite the opposite actually._

"Not at all. I like watching you work," I stated bluntly. Even behind his dark, russet colored skin, I saw a tint of pink form on his cheeks. He turned around and busied himself with the car again. I couldn't help the smile that graced upon my lips.

It was the first genuine smile I've had for six months. It wasn't forced. It wasn't faked. It just came out naturally.

For hours Jake and I stayed in a comfortable silence. He worked on the car while I sat there and watched him work. I couldn't help but stare at the way his muscles flexed. He was beautiful in his own kind of way. _What the hell am I thinking?_

"Bella? You okay?" he asked worriedly. I shook my head from my thoughts and looked up to see him standing in front of me. "You've been staring at me for a whole five minutes now. I know I'm sexy but _damn_," he laughed, his eyes twinkling with humor. I felt a blush crawl its way up my cheeks.

"Shut up," I muttered, "I was just zoning out."

That was also the first time I've blush in six months. _What the hell?_

"Sure you were," he rolled his eyes sarcastically before beaming into a huge smile.

"What?" I asked. Subconsciously, a genuine smile formed on my lips again. _Damn him and his contagious smile! Damn you Jacob Black!_

"Nothing, you just look a bit different," he commented, making me blush again.

"What do you mean?" I asked curiously. I mean, I know I lost a lot of weight and my face was fixed into a permanent scowl but I've been like this for half a year now. How could I look different?

"It's just when you came here earlier, you seemed dead," he replied. "No offense," he quickly added.

"None taken," I assured him. _My life has been ripped away from me. Of course I look dead. Well I __did__ want to die. I guess it's just the closest I'll ever be to dying in the meantime. _

"But now," he continued, "you're sort of glowing. I mean not overly happy but you seem content. You laughed and smiled. _Really _smiled. You just also blushed. You looked so pale earlier and it's nice to see some color in your face." He said this all with happiness and care in his voice. _I doubt that he cares._

"I feel better, I guess. It's just that since Ed – _he_ left," I wrapped my arms around my stomach to stop the pain that came from the mention of his being, "I've really had nothing to live for except Charlie but even then I'm hardly trying my best. I wanted to die Jake. I should've died." I whispered the last sentence. I felt the tears clouding my eyes. I clutched my stomach dependently, not wanting to feel the pain again.

This was the first time I've ever allowed myself to talk about what had happened to me. I didn't want to talk to Charlie about it because he was just going to go into a rampage. He would try to hunt the Cu – _them. _Jake felt like the right guy to talk to. He didn't judge and he didn't pry. He took all my words and sealed it deep within him. His eyes were blazed with sadness.

"Scoot over," he said softly. I moved to the edge of the couch while Jake squeezed himself next to me. "I get it Bells. He was your everything but as I said, he was. He's in the past and you've got to learn to let go. You've got a whole life ahead of you. Maybe you didn't die, because there's something in the future for you. May it be a successful career or a man that will truly give you the love that you deserve," he told me. _No! I don't want anyone else but __him__!_

"It's not that easy," I whispered. "I love _him_. I still do and I don't think I could ever stop. There will be no other man that can ever take his place in my heart," I added firmly. I didn't know who I was trying to convince. _Jake or myself?_

"You never know," he sighed sadly. _What does he mean? What is he trying to say?_ He locked eyes with me and seemed to have been searching for something. I didn't think he found it because he turned away quickly and stood up. I felt my heart lurch for him to be beside me again. _I don't understand myself._ "It's almost eleven. I think the game's almost over," he said in a slightly cold voice.

"Are you okay Jake?" I asked worriedly. I felt my heart clench at the way he had talked to me. I wrapped my arm around my stomach again and clenched it.

"Yeah, I'm just really tired. I think I'm going to crash," he replied. I nodded and followed him quietly back into the house.

"You ready to leave Bells?" my dad asked.

"Yeah," I answered lowly.

"Thanks again for having us Billy," my dad thanked again as he gave Billy a man hug.

"It was our pleasure," Billy smiled. "Did you have fun dear?" he asked me.

"Yeah, I actually did," I replied truthfully as I gave him a smile, not a fake one. If possible, his smile got wider.

"That's nice to hear," he grinned at me. "Give your old man a hug," he joked, outstretching his arms to me. I leaned down and hugged him.

"Please tell Jake I'm sorry for whatever it is that got him so mad," I whispered in his ear before letting go. His lips tightened and he nodded his head. "Thank you," I added.

My dad and I drove back home. "You seemed happy today Bells," he commented in the car.

"I think it was just Jake. His happiness is very contagious," I told him. _Very._

"Jake's a good kid," was the last thing he said before we fell into another comfortable silence. As we got home, I grudgingly walked up the stairs and into my bedroom. Slipping out of my clothes, I put on shorts and a small tank top.

I collapsed onto the bed and closed my eyes. My happiness didn't last very long. Even Jacob's bubbly personality can't take away the ocean of despair that I pathetically wallow in at night.

"_I love you Edward! Please don't leave me!" I begged as I ran after him._

_He stood over a cliff, his back facing me. He turned around and his corner of his lips curled up into an evil smirk. "I thought I told you that I no longer wanted you," he hissed._

"_You must be lying! You said you loved me!" I shouted at him. I collapsed onto the floor and kneeled. "Please," I whispered._

"_Yeah, __loved__," he mocked in a deathly tone. I wrapped my arm around my stomach once again. I felt as though a sword had been pierced through my stomach. "Goodbye," he added with no emotion before diving off the cliff graciously._

"_Edward!" I screamed._

"Bella! Please wake up," Charlie pleaded as he grabbed my shoulders, shaking me back and forth. I opened my eyes and looked at him. He crushed me to his chest and sobbed. "It was only a dream. It will okay," he assured me. I cried into him for the millionth time.

_It won't be okay._

**So? So? SO?**

**Did you like it? :]**

**The next few chapters are about to get interesting. Keep on the lookout for updates!**

**Remember, the more REVIEWS I receive, the faster this story gets UPDATED!**

**REVIEWS encourage me to write more, that is why I ask you guys to do so... if you we're wondering xD**

**ANYWAYS, don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	3. Charlie Loves Me

**Thanks for the feedback I've been receiving you guys! I don't think you understand how much I love your REVIEWS. (P.S. Especially long ones c:) Keep 'em coming! **

Chapter 3: Charlie Loves Me

**Bella POV**

It's been a whole entire week since I had last seen Jake. I truly hope he wasn't mad at me anymore. _What was he mad about anyways?_

I fell back to my usual routine: wake up, go to school, go home, force feed, fake happiness for Charlie, go back to sleep. Honestly, I was getting tired of it but I didn't see any other way for me to live my life. I had thought about committing suicide several times but Charlie's face would pop up in my mind and I would instantly regret it.

I could tell that he was getting tired of me but he just didn't have the guts to ask me to move out. Last time he had, I threw a tantrum. He doesn't have to feel bad about it. I already know that no one wants me, what would make him any different?

At school, I was constantly zoning out. I hardly talked to the crew anymore and it's not like I needed to. They would ignore me anyways. Jessica and Lauren just couldn't help but insult me relentlessly about why Edward had left me. I came close to beating them up one time. _Too close._

"_Of course Edward left you. You're so plain and boring. What did he see in you anyways?" Lauren spat._

_I bit my lip to keep in a snappy response. Instead, I gave her a tight-lipped smile and kept my head down. _

"_You know what? I bet he left you because he saw someone better. The girl must have been beautiful. Then again, any girl is more beautiful than you," Jessica insulted with a triumphant smile on her face._

_Angela just stayed quiet by my side. Though we didn't talk as much, she still stood by me as a frie – an __acquaintance__. _

"_I'm glad he left you in the forest. It would have been great if you had just died. Charlie would have one less person to take care of. I don't even think he wants you anymore," Lauren continued._

_At that, I saw red cloud my eyes. I clenched my fist under the table and closed my eyes to control my anger. My breathing was labored and Lauren was smiling like she had just won a competition. She's been trying to break me for months now and she had finally succeeded. _

"_Now that's unfair Lauren! You have no right to say those things to Bella," Angela shouted as she stood from her seat. The whole cafeteria's attention was turned towards us now._

"_No. Angela. Let her continue. She's been trying to break me for months now. Let's see what she's got," I hissed, standing up myself. Angela searched my eyes and nodded in understanding._

"_You don't do anything but cause trouble for everyone. First, you stole the most gorgeous man on earth from all of us," there were murmurs of agreement, "I bet he just felt sorry for you. Want to know what else? You're the reason why your parents even split. If you had never been born I bet your parents would still be happily married. You should have just __died__," she spat out the word harshly._

_I got out of my seat and shoved her back. She wore shock on her face. "Fuck you Lauren! You can talk bad about me but when you bring my parents in this, you cross the damn line!" I shot at her. I walked over to her and grabbed her by the collar. She was about to slap me but I grabbed both of her hands. "What? You think I didn't want to die? I did. I wanted to so bad. Why do you think I stayed in the forest, where no one could find me?" I spat on her face._

_Angela gasped. "Bella?" she squeaked. I nodded at her, answering her unasked question. Her eyes filled with tears._

"_To hell with you Lauren! You don't think I've tried to commit suicide either? Because I damn well have! You want to know why I stop every single time? Because of Charlie who I fucking know loves me enough to sleep with me at night, like I'm a baby, just so that I don't have nightmares at night, that claw and rip through my whole being. So don't talk shit about me or my family when don't know crap!" I shouted bringing my fist to collide with her nose._

"_Isabella!" the principal shouted as she entered the cafeteria._

"_If you're going to speak about how I'm being inappropriate, well, screw you too!" I yelled at her. I grabbed my stuff and marched out of the school. Everyone's eyes followed me with pity. I stopped at the door and turned around swiftly, facing the whole population of Forks High School. "Next time you mess with me, you'll end up just like her. Shut your traps and I don't need any of your pity!" I shouted before heading back home._

Charlie received a call from the principal the same day. He had actually been proud of me and told me not to let anyone get to me. Contrary to what Lauren said, he told me that he loves me and would never push me away.

Ever since then, I had been sitting alone at lunch. No one wanted to get near me. They cleared the halls and made sure there was always an empty table in the cafeteria. I couldn't help but snicker at how I was being treated. I didn't mind it though.

"Seriously Bella, you need to get out of the house," my dad pleaded, "You're just going to catch dust here."

_He's never going to give up, is he?_

"Fine. Maybe I could go visit Jacob," I sighed in defeat. His eyes lit up when I mentioned Jacob.

"Yes!" he replied all too loudly. He coughed a bit and talked again. "I mean, yes you can go see him. Come to think of it, you can go to La Push anytime you want to, but don't make a habit of skipping school. Kay?" he asked. I blinked several times.

_Is he giving me permission to skip school?_

"Are you hearing yourself?" I asked suspiciously.

"I know what I said Bella. Jacob seems like an influential person to you. Last week proved just as much. I haven't seen you that way since the fu – I mean, _he_ left. Jake makes you at least a bit happier," he gave me a consolation smile as well. I nodded and stood up to grab my keys.

"I'll be back home at ten," I announced.

"You can come home at _any_ time," he contradicted. I raised my eyebrow at him and he shrugged. I shook my head and ran to my car.

On the way there, I saw two motorcycles laid out on the street. There was a sign that said: Motorcycles on Sale. It caught my eye and thought of what Jake had told me. _He said he needed parts so maybe he could disassemble these to get the parts he needs. Maybe this could help him forgive me too, for whatever it is that I had done._ I parked my car on the curb and got out. There was a boy, maybe 18 or 19, sitting on the front porch, obviously bored. When he saw me, he instantly perked up and bounded over to me.

"Bella Swan? What brings you here?" he greeted, "You interested?"

"Yeah, how much for these babies?" I asked, running my hand over the motorcycle.

"I'll give them to you for free," he replied. I looked at him like he was crazy.

"Free?" I scoffed. "What's the catch?"

"There's no catch. I just really want to get rid of them. These motorcycles are good for dead but my dad thinks otherwise, says I should give it to someone who'll take care of it. You can do that, right? But you'd need to know a hell of a good mechanic to get these fixed," he answered. _It just so happens that I do._

"I'll take them!" I exclaimed. He grinned and clapped his hands.

"Great. I'll help you load it in your car," I gave him a nod.

After we finished, I thanked him, "Thanks."

"No," he waved his hand, "_Thank you_."

I got back in my car and drove towards La Push. When I reached their house, I decided to just check out the garage first. I could hear Jake working inside again. I took a deep breath.

"Hey Jake," I said softly. His head bumped onto the hood of the car again. I laughed carelessly, shocking myself. _Maybe he is a good person to be around with._ "Is this the greeting I'm going to get in response every time?" I teased with a small smirk on my face.

"Bella!" he exclaimed, taking me up in his arms as he twirled me around. I laughed and patted his head.

"Down boy," I joked. "I have something for you," I told him. His eyes lit up with curiosity.

"Ohh! What is it? I love surprises," he grinned. I shook my head and grabbed his hand. Surprisingly, the gesture felt natural to me. I didn't even hesitate or think about it, I just _did_. He seemed to have that kind of effect on me.

"Here we go," I announced, gesturing towards the motorcycles.

"Motorcycles!" he squeaked. I could help but giggle at his reaction. _Giggle?_

"Yup, Jake. One's for me and the other is for you. You can have it for free if we work on them together," I wiggled my eyebrows at him playfully.

"You didn't have to do this Bella. It must have cost you a fortune," he frowned.

"Hey, turn that from upside down," I took a step closer to him and placed a finger on both corners of his lips, lifting it up. He grabbed my wrists softly. Our bodies were nearly pressed against each other and Jake closed his eyes.

"Bells," he whispered as he let go of me. I took a step back and faltered in my step. _What just happened?_

I decided to change the subject quickly. "Actually, it didn't cost me a single penny. While I was driving here, I saw these two babies lying on the sidewalk. The owner of them said they were good for dead unless I knew a professional mechanic so he gave them to me for free. As far as I know, you're the best here," I smiled at him. Instantly, the awkward tension between us dissolved.

"But what if I'm not good enough?" he asked lowly. Somehow, it seemed like there was so much more behind his simple words.

"You're good enough Jake, more than good enough," I assured him, finding that I, myself, meant so much more behind them.

He grinned at me and twirled me around in another hug. "Thanks Bells. I don't deserve any of this, especially because of what I did. I'm sorry for being rude to you last week. I don't know what came over me," he apologized.

"It's nothing Jake. Don't worry about it," I told him. He nodded and walked over to the motorcycles. "Do you need hel – " I cut myself off as I watched in awe at how Jake easily eased the motorcycles on the ground. "Have you been working out?"

"Me? Nah," he denied. "These came naturally," he flexed his arms dramatically, kissing his muscles.

"You're such a dork," I laughed. He merely grinned back at me and brought down the other motorcycle.

"We should bring these into the garage. We wouldn't want my dad to see them. He'd tell Charlie immediately," he chuckled, hushing his voice.

"I swear, they gossip like old women," I added, making me and him double over in laughter. We slyly brought the motorcycles in the garage and then plopped down on the couch.

"Soda?" he asked.

"Yes please," I replied. He tossed one to me and I caught it without much effort, surprisingly. The soda was warm but I didn't mind. Sipping into the drink, I lazily curled my legs under me.

"What really brought you here Bells? You said that you got the motorcycles on the way here so your first plan must have not included giving one to me," he told me.

"My dad said I needed to get out of the house. You were the first person I thought about and he seemed to be more than happy to ship me off here," I answered.

"What can I say? Charlie loves me," he declared cockily.

"Who wouldn't?" I asked jokingly.

"So you're saying you love me too?" he replied with an eyebrow raised.

"Of course, you're like my brother," I responded quickly. His facial expression dropped for a moment before he quickly covered it up. I was about to add more to the statement but then I realized that it would be inappropriate.

_But sometimes I wished it was more, only so that I could finally forget __him__._

**Hmm, how'd you like it?**

**NEXT CHAPTER: You guys are finally going to get a glimpse inside Jake's POV. The whole 4th chapter is written in his point of view so brace yourselves! **

**More REVIEWS = FASTER Updates**

**So... REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	4. Wait For Me

Chapter 4: Wait For Me

**Jacob POV**

A crush.

_Who the hell am I kidding?_

Bella is more than a crush.

_I'm in love with the girl._

Maybe at first it was just a crush, but as each day passed by, it became more than just that.

We have been working on the motorcycles for about a month now. Honestly, I've thought about purposely taking forever on fixing them just so that Bella won't stop visiting me, but I never pulled through with it. I knew how wrong it was. I didn't want to lie to her. _Never._ She's been through so much already and I don't want to add on to it by lying.

She has been looking better already. Her face no longer had the dull shade it used to have. She didn't look like the living dead anymore. Her cheeks regained their color and she now looks just as beautiful as she once had the first time I met her.

I'm happy that she's happy. I love the way she smiles, the way her eyebrows furrow when she's frustrated, the way she bites her lips when she's nervous, and the way she blushes. Most especially, I love that I'm the one who was able to bring all those characteristics back into her.

_God_, when I saw Sam put her into Charlie's arms the day she was found, I wanted to do nothing but hunt down that asshole and tear him limb from limb. She looked lifeless. _Hopeless._ No one ever deserves to be treated that way, to be thrown away like a piece of trash. I can see how insecure he's made Bella. Whenever I compliment her about _anything_, she always has to go and defend about how it's not true.

I've never been one to believe in my tribe's legends, but I guess this may just be an exception. Edward is a _leech._ He sucked the life out of Bella. He's a _murderer._

I see the way Bella wraps her hand around her stomach whenever something reminds her of _them_, of _him._ I'm sure she doesn't know, but it kills me so much. It kills me to know how much damage was inflicted on her and I'm scared, scared that I may never be able to put her back together.

I want her to someday be able to love me the way I love her. I want her to love me more than she had ever loved the _leech_. She has to see how good we are together. She and I are as natural as breathing. There's no effort, no trouble, we just _are._

I know that it's going to take time. A _lot_ of time, and a lot of patience. But like I said, in the end, it will all be worth it. _Bella is so worth it._

I can see how her feelings for me are changing. Every day, she never forgets to tell me how lucky she is to have a best friend like me. _Best friend? Yeah, right._ I can see everything in her eyes. I know she loves me too, maybe not as much as I love her, but it's enough. She's still hung up over _him_, I get that but I need her to learn how to let others in, how to let me in.

The way she acts around me proves a lot too. I sense how her breaths come in nothing but quick pants whenever I close the distance between us. I've honestly heard her heart skip a beat one time. _No joke._ Sometimes, I'd even find her staring at me with such an intense expression. She may not know it, but I know that she's slowly falling in love with me too.

"Hey Jake?" she asked with a coarse tone.

"Yeah Bells?" I replied as I brought my head out from under the hood of the Rabbit.

"I think I'm going crazy," she stated bluntly. I looked at her and realized that she had tears in her eyes. Worried, I wiped the grease off of my hands and sat next to her.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly before crushing her into my chest. She broke out into loud sobs. I felt my heart tear in two for her. _How I wish that I can just take it all away._

"Remember when we tried out the bikes?" she asked. _How could I forget? I was scared out of my damn mind!_

"Yeah, you hit yourself on a rock," I answered, not understanding how it had to do with anything.

"When I was on the bike, I heard _him._ I don't know how, but I just did. _He_ told me how stupid and reckless I was for even attempting to ride the bike. _He_ told me to stop, but I just couldn't. _His_ voice was just so alluring and I wanted to keep hearing it. I never wanted _him_ to go a-away," she cried into my chest.

"Oh Bella," I whispered softly with a cracked voice. It pained me to see how messed up she's become and how much she still loves the asshole.

"Then yesterday, my dad forced me to go out with Angela. I went shopping with her but then I saw this group of guys that reminded me of a time when I was nearly raped," she continued. I was going to ask about what the hell she was talking about but she held a hand to stop me.

"I realized that if it was reckless things that would help me hear _his_ voice again, then I would do it. I got on a motorcycle with one of the guys there. I heard _him _again. I was so elated and happy. I didn't see how idiotic it was for me to do that until Angela gave me an hour lesson of how I shouldn't just unexpectedly do things like that," she finished her story.

I stood up from my spot next to her and clenched my fists. I closed my eyes as I tried to control my anger. _What the fuck?_ I wanted to punch a wall. "What the fuck were you thinking Bella? You don't – you never do that! He could have raped you. Oh god, I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if that ever happened. That was so stupid!" I shouted at her. The moment the words came out from my mouth, I instantly regretted it.

A fresh new batch of tears escaped her eyes. "You're right. I'm so stupid Jake! I don't even understand myself. Why do I keep doing things like those when all they do is hurt me? Please help me Jake! Don't, don't give up on me," she pleaded to me, her eyes puffy and red.

My resolve was breaking down again. Though I regretted the way I shouted at her, I knew that she deserved what I had told her. How dare she endanger her life like that? Does she not understand how much Charlie needs her? How much I need her?

I sighed and brought her into my arms. "I'm so sorry for shouting at you Bells. I'm just so mad that you would ever consider doing such a thing, let alone actually _do_ it. You have to promise me that you'll never do anything like that ever again," I told her.

"I promise," she agreed, nodding against my chest. I let out a sigh of relief and began stroking her hair, while I hummed a lullaby.

"Fixing the motorcycles is not the only reason why I've bothered to be with you every day for the past month. I want you to become whole again too Bella. You have no idea how much it hurts to see you like this. It hurts so much," I whispered sadly against her. _Way too fucking much._

She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me tightly against her. "I'm so sorry Jake. I've been so selfish. I don't deserve you. I've done nothing but take advantage of your friendship and I've never given as to anything back," she sobbed into my shoulder.

"Bella, the way you've changed is more than enough. Look at you, you're smiling, blushing, and laughing. You're no longer that shell of a person that you once were. You still love him, I get it. But please Bells, I need you to move on. Just try," I begged as I cradled her face in between my hands.

Small tears trailed down her face and I used my thumb to brush them away. "I-I'll t-try," she stuttered. I smiled softly and kissed her forehead. Her eyes fluttered at the contact.

"That's more than I could ask for," I whispered.

"I just don't understand why you bother with me," she said softly, "I'm not worth it."

_It's now or never._

I sighed and looked directly into her eyes. "I don't know what _he_ may have said to make you think so low of yourself, but never doubt that you are worth it. You are so worth it, Bella Swan. You may not reciprocate the feelings, but I love you. _I'm in love with you._ I'll be here. I'll wait forever for you to be ready again. I'll never leave," I vowed, pouring my heart and soul to her.

She gasped slightly and gazed back into my eyes, as if searching for any faults. "You can't love me. No one can. _He_ never did," she whispered. _God, I'm going to kill that motherfucker._

"But I do. Can't you see it? I'm helplessly in love with you. It may have been a crush at first, but it's proven to be more. I know that you can feel it. Please don't fight it," I begged her, holding onto her hands for dear life. _Please don't push me away. _

"I don't know if I – " she cut herself off and looked me over. For the first time, I saw something flash through her eyes. _Hope? _"I'm not worth it but even if you're persistent enough, it's going to take a lot of waiting," she finally sniffled. My eyes widened as I realized what she has just said. _Did she just practically ask me to wait for her?_ I searched her eyes to see if she truly meant it. She did.

"I'm here forever. I'll wait," I promised her before taking her into a huge hug.

She cupped my face and closed her eyes. "It may not be love yet Jake, but I can honestly tell you that I'm falling more and more with every day. I can no longer bear to come here every day and lie to your face about how you're only my best friend. I know that I'm only lying to myself. I have no right to ask you for this, but I'm going to need you to wait for me. I need to know that you'll always be there. _Here_. I don't want you to just be another _him_," she said with a soft voice, as she caressed my cheek with her thumb.

"Always," I declared. Her eyes lit up with tears, but this time they were happy tears.

"Thank you," she whispered, burying herself into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her body and pulled her closer to me. I rubbed her back in comfort and just held her there.

"You'll never regret giving me this chance," I promised again. _Never._

"I know I won't," I could feel her smile against my skin. I couldn't help but smile myself.

Our moment just had to be ruined by none other than my idiotic friend. _Wait. Quil? Where the hell is Embry?_

Sensing Quil's presence, Bella pulled away from me. She gave me a small smile before scrambling back onto the worn out couch. "What do you want fucker?" I asked as soon as he stepped into the garage. I heard Bella giggle and my heart soared. I love her freaking giggle. _You've officially turned into a sap Jacob Black._

"Well, I see that I'm not wanted here," Quil said sarcastically as he rolled his eyes.

"Obviously," I pointed out, this time with a grin. He flipped me off before focusing his attention on Bella. _Asshole._

"Hey Bella," he greeted.

"How are you Quil?" she asked with a small consolation smile.

"Great actually, except the fact that Embry's no longer mine or Jake's friend," he stated bluntly, but I could hear and sense the pain and anger that lingered in his voice.

"Don't tell me…." I trailed off as I clenched my fists.

"Yeah, he's gone off to Sam's little groupie," he managed to get out through gritted teeth.

"Sam? Wasn't he the one who saved me?" Bella asked from her spot.

"Don't remind me," I groaned. "As much as I hate his guts, I do owe him for your life."

"What's so wrong about him?" Bella asked again.

"It's one hell of a long story. You sure you want to hear it?" Quil told her. She nodded her head furiously.

"I've got time," she grinned. Quil sat on the floor while I took a seat next to Bella.

"Well, there was a time when Jared and Paul hated Sam's guts as much as we do," I started

"You sure?" she asked with her eyebrows scrunched. "They seem like they could pass for brothers," she contradicted.

"You've heard of the time when Sam disappeared, right?" Quil asked. She nodded. "Well, after he came back, that's when he started acting like he fucking own the Rez. Same thing happened to Jared and Paul. They both disappeared for weeks and no one knew where the hell they went, but the second they came back, they just started following Sam like it's what they were always meant to do," he continued.

"And it's so weird, because they were starting to hover over Embry, and look where Embry's at now. He's with _them._ They also look at me, like they're expecting me to join them soon and it's... it's just _fucking ridiculous,_" I added.

"So you hate them because they think they're all that?" Bella asked, biting her lip.

"Pretty much," Quil shrugged.

I looked at her with disbelief when she started laughing, clutching her stomach as if it hurt with laughter.

"Oh my god," she breathed out as she wiped a small laughter tear off of her eye.

"How is that funny?" I sneered.

"Yeah...?" Quil agreed.

"I don't know. It just reminded me of myself a bit," she answered, "there's these two girls, Jessica and Lauren, and just like _the gang_, they act like they own the school. It's _fucking ridiculous_," she stated, repeating what I had said.

Both mine and Quil's jaws dropped and we looked at her in shock.

"Bella Swan does not cuss," I mused. _But boy, did she sound sexy._

"When the hell did this happen?" Quil asked.

"Guess you haven't heard what I've done yet either?" she asked, a tiny glint formed on her eyes.

"What exactly did you do?" I asked slowly.

"I punched Lauren in the face and broke her nose _and then_ I practically told the principal to 'screw herself' in front of the whole school," she replied, smiling with pride. _Fuck, I would pay anything to see that._

"Holy shit! I didn't take you for someone so violent," Quil teased.

"And did I tell you that I threatened nearly every student in the school? Yeah, well, I think it's safe to say that none of them will ever try to bother me again," she beamed.

"You are so _hard core_"

**YAY! :DDDDD**

**Did you guys like this chapter? Hmmm...?**

**Anyways, guess what? I MADE A TUMBLR! FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR! Please? :]**

**REMEMBER: More REVIEWS = FASTER UPDATES  
**

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	5. Almost There

**Sorry for not updating in a while! I meant to update earlier but I lost track of time and before I knew it, it's almost been a week since I last updated. SORRY!**

Chapter 5: Almost There

**Bella POV**

I'm trying. I've been trying so hard to move on.

I wasn't lying when I told Jake my feelings for him. Every day, I forced myself to tell him that he was nothing but my best friend, because I just wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to have the capacity to love someone again. _Love?_

It's not love yet, that I'm sure of, but I'm getting there. _Slowly._ I'm still trying to pick up whatever is left of my heart, and when I do, I'll make sure to give what's rest of me to Jake. _He_ tore apart a huge part of my heart, but I want it back. I may have not wanted it back before, but I want to be whole for Jake. He deserves to be loved the way he loves me. I can't fathom the thought of him being with another girl.

I still love _him._ I know I do. I don't think I'll ever be able to not love him. He was my first love and that's something you never get over. Just look at Charlie. Even after all these years, he's still hung up over my mom because she was his first love.

I've been learning how to let Jake in. It's going to take a long time, but if he's still there by the time I'm ready, then he can have me. _What's left of me, that is. _No. I'm going to give him _all_ of me. If I have to track Edward down and demand him to give me back what he tore from my heart, then I'll do it. For once in my life, someone actually loves me with their heart and soul and shows it. I'm not going to let Jake slip from my fingers. _Ever._

_Wait, hold up. I just said __his__ name without falling apart._

Jumping off of my truck, I scrambled to get to Jake's house. He met me halfway and twirled me around. "What's the visit for Bells?" he laughed lightly. I grinned up at him.

"I just thought _his _name without falling apart Jake! Look, Edward. See? I can say his name now too," I exclaimed happily. _Almost there._ He smiled brightly and lifted me off of the floor.

"I'm so happy Bella," he whispered into my ear. Without hesitating, I landed a kiss on his neck. I felt him tense for a bit, but I didn't let it bother me.

"I'm getting there Jake. I'm so close," I told him sincerely. He pulled away and looked deeply into my eyes.

"I've got all the time in the world," he assured me. He kissed my forehead gently and placed me back on the floor. "Take your time," he said softly. I nodded and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you so much," I whispered, hugging him close to me.

"I'll never leave you Bella. I'll always be here," he promised. _I know you will._

"You want to go to the beach?" I finally asked, breaking the comfortable silence between us.

"Sure, sure," he smiled. We began walking to the beach side by side and his arm dangled as he walked. I wanted to grab his hand, but I didn't know if it would be pushing our boundaries. As if sensing my want, he grabbed my hand without hesitation and laced our fingers together. "Stop being so nervous Bella. Just let it be," he grinned.

I sighed softly and pressed myself closer to his side. "I know. Sorry," I apologized.

"So…. how's life been?" he asked so suddenly. I laughed wholeheartedly and raised my eyebrow at him.

"Seriously?" I chuckled.

"What? I really want to know," he answered without fake enthusiasm.

"Well, Charlie's been nothing but happy this past month," I started out. Jake let out a belly laugh. "Hey, it's not funny. He literally forces me to come here every day," I defended.

"I told you. The old man loves me," Jake joked. I elbowed him in the stomach.

"You know, he even encourages me to skip school just so I could see you," I added. Tears rimmed his eyes as he continued to laugh.

"Oh man, that is way too funny," he wiped away the tears in his eyes.

"I can't say that I'm not glad though. It's nice to know that he's Team Jacob," I laughed. _Yeah, he really said that._

"He seriously said that?" he asked in disbelief. I grinned at his expression.

"Oh yeah, he was like 'Screw that bastard, I'm all for Team Jacob,'" I mocked.

"It's official Bella. You have the most awesome dad in the world," he laughed. Letting go of my hand, he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

"Maybe I shouldn't have fed your ego too much," I teased.

"You love it," he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and I playfully hit him.

"Shut up," I muttered, but I tried to conceal a smile that was playing on the corner of my lips.

He plopped us down on the beach. I leaned my head on his shoulder and sighed. Sometimes I wish that I had never been a part of the vampire world, just so that it could only be me and Jake without restrictions. Things are natural between us.

"This is nice," he commented. I looked up and saw him staring at the water with a small smile.

"It sure is," I agreed.

"You know, this is where we spread out my mom's ashes. I like to think that she's always somewhere in the distance watching over me and my dad," he said softly. I felt my eyes water for him.

"This beach does feel special," I agreed with him.

"Of course it is. It's also the place where I first met you," he grinned at me. I laughed at his playful expression. He looked just like a kid again.

"I remember. My dad brought me here for the first time when I was like five. I ran away from him and crashed into you. Turns out he and Billy were supposed to be meeting up anyways," I smiled, recalling the event.

"Yeah," he smirked, "even then, you couldn't keep your hands off of me."

I gasped in mock hurt. "That is a lie," I defended.

"Sure, sure," he laughed.

I sighed, not really wanting to leave. "I need to get going. I'm supposed to be buying groceries," I told him.

"Mind if I tag along?" he asked.

"Not at all," I assured him. We walked back to his house and he went to go tell Billy that he was coming with me. Soon after, we were on the road.

"What are we supposed to buy?" he asked.

"I have a list on the dashboard. Can you get it?" I told him. He nodded and picked up the list.

"Bread, eggs, bacon, chicken," he read off. He continued to read off the other items until he stopped on one in particular. "Dog treats?" he asked with an eyebrow raised. I blushed a bit.

"It's for the station's dog. Sometimes my dad ends up having to take care of it, but in all honesty it's me doing all the work. Charlie can barely survive by himself, let alone have a dog," I chuckled, remembering the time that the dog trashed our house under his supervision.

"You got a soft spot for dogs, Swan?" he joked.

"Yes, actually. I do," I grinned at him. He let out a laugh and then intertwined our fingers together with a small smile.

As we arrived at the grocery store, Jake went to go get a cart. "Where to first?" he asked.

"I guess we can start with the bread," I shrugged.

I took the cart from him and began pushing it. Soon enough, I felt his presence behind me. He placed both of his hands on either side of me and pushed the cart along with me. We were in such an intimate position that I didn't want to point it out. I reveled in the feeling of his presence.

When we got to the aisle where the breads were, I turned around and crashed into his chest unexpectedly. Looking up, I saw his dark, intense gaze on my lips. "Jake?" I whispered lowly.

He began to lean in closer and closer and I found myself doing the same. I could feel his breath on my skin and I wanted nothing more than to feel his lips on mine. "Do you want me to?" he asked huskily. I got myself to nod. When our lips were only millimeters apart, the voice I _now_ most dreaded to hear came back.

_Don't do this Bella. _He was back again.

I gasped for air and I almost immediately pulled away from Jacob. "I'm sorry," I apologized over and over again. Jake sighed and pulled me to his chest.

"I told you I'd give you time. No pressure," he promised. He placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. No matter how much he covered it up, I could still hear the pain and anger that lingered in his voice. I wanted to smack myself for being such an idiot.

We finished getting the rest of the groceries and I was already driving back to La Push. We arrived soon enough and I got out of the car to hug him goodbye. "See you tomorrow?" I asked hopefully.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he smiled. He pulled me back into a hug. _Whoa, he's so hot._

"Are you okay Jake? You're hot," I commented.

"Why, thank you," he smirked cockily.

"No, seriously. You're burning up Jake," I told him.

"I feel fine Bella," he assured me. I placed my hand on his forehead and gasped at the burning sensation.

"Maybe I should just – " he cut me off harshly.

"I said I'm fine," he pressed on further.

"Okay," I managed to get out. I didn't realized how much it hurt to hear him talk to me like that. "I-I'll call you when I get home," I stuttered before scrambling back on my car.

He grabbed my wrist and crushed me to his chest. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "I'll check out what's going on with me, then I'll call you," he said.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Positive," he replied.

* * *

It's been three hours since I got home, and I still haven't received a call from Jake. I was starting to get worried. What if he was so sick, he couldn't even talk anymore?

I worriedly looked for my phone and called his house. After a few rings, someone finally answered. "Hello?" came Billy's gruff voice.

"Billy, thank god. Jake was supposed to call me and it's been nearly three hours. Is he okay? Can I talk to him?" I asked hastily.

"He can't come to the phone right now. He's really sick Bella. I suggest you just let him rest," he sighed sadly.

"I'm supposed to meet up with him tomorrow. Maybe I can bring him some soup to make him feel – " Billy cut me off with a cold, hard voice.

"Just don't visit him at all, okay?" he snapped. With that, he hung up on me.

The phone fell from my hands and I slid down the wall. _Oh god, he's finally gotten tired of me._ I closed my eyes and tried to relieve myself of the tears that were threatening to fall from my eyes. I clenched my fists as I tried to get rid of the pain.

_He's just sick Bella. Give him time._

Grudgingly, I put the phone back in its place and walked up to my room. I changed out of my clothes and slid under the sheets of my bed.

For the past month, I haven't had any nightmares. I guess Jake's presence did that to me. Still, I brace myself every night, just in case they start to come back again. Holding the sheets close to me, I closed my eyes as I willed myself to sleep.

For the first time in 31 days, I had a nightmare. The only difference this time is that it wasn't about Edward.

"_Jake! Jake! Please don't leave me too!" I pleaded as I ran after him._

"_Just go back to Cullen. You don't want me. So, I don't want you either," he snapped at me harshly. He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back on the cold, ground floor._

"_Jake," I whimpered._

"_I don't want you. I'm tired of waiting," he hissed._

_Clutching at my chest, I let myself sink into the darkness. "No!"_

I bounced from my bed and panted heavily.

"Bella!" Charlie shouted as he burst into my room. I cried and cried.

"He doesn't want me either dad," I sobbed into his chest.

**OOHH SNAP!**

**Yes, HELL YES, the story is finally about to get interesting. I'm warning you now, from here on out, the angst is going to hit you guys FULL FORCE, well, in most of the upcoming chapters :D**

**REVIEWS guys! Please REVIEW! The last chapter only got, what, 6 REVIEWS? I haven't had REVIEWS that few before. PLEASE REVIEW!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	6. Still

**HOORAY for ANGST! This is one of the ANGSTY chapters of the story. Hope you like it! :D**

_"Nothing can shatter the promise I made to you"_

_-Desert Lands, Trading Yesterday_

Chapter 6: Still

**Jacob POV**

I wanted to beat someone up. We were so close. I'm betting that she heard _his_ voice again. That's the reason why she pulled away, I know it. Even though I assured her that everything was okay, I knew that it wasn't. No matter what I do, I'm always competing for her heart. I'll never be able to truly have all of her.

By the time she dropped me off, I wanted to do nothing but just destroy something. I walked back into the house feeling terrible. I felt like I was crawling out of my own skin. "Dad," I whimpered.

"Jake?" he asked worriedly.

I felt my muscles ache. My eyesight was getting blurry and I had to hold on to something to keep myself standing up. I lost my footing and fell on the ground. I felt my bones start to displace themselves. "Dad! Help me!" I shouted.

"It's happening," he whispered. I slightly heard him dialing a phone number. "Sam! Shit. It's happening. I need you here now!" he yelled into the phone. _Sam? I don't want him here!_

"It hurts," I chanted. I clutched my chest and yelled out into wind.

"It'll all get better Jake. I promise," he assured.

I feel like I'm being torn up into pieces. My heart is beating erratically under my chest and I can barely bear it anymore. My bones are fighting against each other and can't seem to find their rightful places.

I felt myself being lifted up into burning hot arms. "AHH!" I screamed loudly.

"I'm here to help you Jake," Sam's voice told me.

"It hurts," I whispered.

Pain shot out through my chest. I thrashed in his arms. Soon enough, I felt him place me on the ground floor of the forest. _What the hell?_

"Bella doesn't love you. She never will," he shot at me.

"Shut up," I whimpered. I clutched my stomach at the anger I was feeling. It was unbearable.

"Her heart belongs to Edward Cullen and you'll never be able to win her heart," he continued with the torturous statements.

"Shut up!" I shouted. With that, I burst out of my own skin. My eyes were set on Sam's figure and I charged at him. I growled at him in anger.

He met me halfway and then turned into a wolf. _Wolf? What the fuck?_

_Calm down Jacob._ A voice commanded.

Freaked out, I looked around frantically. _Who are you? What do you want from me?_ I demanded to know.

_It's me, Sam. I'm the black wolf in front of you._ He finally answered. I looked ahead of me and stared into the eyes of none other than Sam.

_What's going on? Why am I like this?_

_It's in your blood Jacob. You were born to be a shape-shifter._ He told me.

_I don't believe this. Are the others wolves too? Paul? Jared? Embry?_ I asked.

_Yes._ _We are meant to protect our people. _He continued.

_From what?_

_Vampires._ He growled out.

_The Cullens….._ I trailed off.

**Bella POV**

Fourteen days, nine hours, thirty-four minutes, and twelve seconds.

_Thirteen._

_Fourteen._

_Fifteen._

It's been two weeks. Two incredibly horrible weeks since I last heard or talked to Jake.

I tried calling him every day for the first week, but I always get disappointed by Billy's voice. After the seventh day, I just gave up. Billy had told me that Jake was hanging out with his friends. Not with Quil. Not with Embry, but with _Sam. _Knowing that Jake was better yet he still hadn't called me, proved that he just didn't want me anymore.

I've been back to square one. I have to force myself to smile, laugh, and eat again. This time, it's much worse.

I've cut myself several times. My left arm is full of cuts and I have to wear long sleeved shirts everyday to hide them. I'm so numb that even just the slightest feeling of pain gives me the pleasure of knowing that I'm still alive, that maybe I'm not completely lifeless.

Charlie just recently caught me cutting. He was mad. He was _furious._ He demanded me to tell him what was going on. The only thing I could utter was "Jacob." He nearly went on a rampage. He called Billy and shouted at him. I couldn't bear it. I locked myself in my room and brought my knees close to my chest, wrapping my arms around me. I felt like I was going to fall apart if I didn't hold myself together.

Even then, I could still hear his shouts. Silent tears trailed down my face, as I heard what he was telling Billy. "What did your son do to my daughter? She's worse Billy! She's much, much worse. I saw her cutting herself today, so don't tell me that I'm just overreacting!"

Letting myself sink into the ocean of pain that I was wallowing in, I closed my eyes. Pain electrocuted itself in my body and I let out a shriek of despair. I stood up angrily and began trashing my room. "Edward didn't want me! Jacob doesn't want me! No one ever wants me!" I shouted to myself. I ripped the pictures of me and Jacob off of the walls and threw them on the ground. "Why can't you just tell me yourself instead of having Billy do it for you?" I yelled into one of the pictures furiously.

Charlie threw himself into the room. "God, Bella!" he shouted at me. I pushed through past him and ran out of the house. "Where are you going?" he ran after me.

"I'm done dealing with this crap, Dad! If Jake doesn't want me, then I'll force him to tell me himself," I replied irritably before getting into the piece of junk that I called my truck. _Fuck you truck! Stupid truck! Stupid freaking Jacob!_

I made it to his house in a record breaking time of ten minutes. I was livid. I didn't care if I was pushing past the driving limit. I forced the damn truck to drive at more than fifty miles per hour. The moment I stepped out of the truck, I was faced with four tall Native American boys that stood in front of Jake's door like freaking guard dogs.

"Don't do this Bella," Sam warned me.

"I'll do whatever the fuck I want to do Sam. I'm not one of your followers. I don't take orders from you," I shouted at him. "Now, where the hell is Jacob? Let me talk to him!" I demanded.

"Jake doesn't want you anymore. Why can't you just accept it and move the fuck on?" Paul spat at me.

"I know he doesn't want me. Don't you all get it? I know that! But I need to hear it from him. Not from you. Not from Billy. I want to hear it from his mouth. If you can get him to do that, then hooray for you. I'll leave him alone," I hissed at all of them.

"Leave us for a second," I finally heard his voice. He stepped out of his house, looking guarded.

"Jake, you know you're not supposed to – " he cut, who I assume to be Jared, off.

"Just go," he ordered. Sam and the others nodded at his demand and left us.

He began walking onto the forest and I was just gaping at him. He looked so different. He no longer had long hair, but in its place, was short, cropped hair that made his cheekbones look much stronger. He grew taller as well. _Much taller_. The muscles he once had doubled in size.

I followed after him, feeling like that's what he wanted. He hadn't even said one word to me. My eyes grew heavy with unshed tears. Tears that I did not want to shed in his presence. "What happened? What did Sam do to you?" I managed to get out.

I saw him clench his fists and I felt myself flinch at the small gesture. "Sam didn't do anything to me. In fact, he's helping me deal with this," he replied coldly.

"Then what happened?" I pressed on further, really wanting to know.

He laughed darkly, but did not turn around to face me. "You really want to know what happened?" he said harshly. "You're stupid bloodsuckers is what happened. They did this to me. They did this to all of us!" he shouted at me as he finally turned around.

I gulped. _He can't possibly know about the Cullens. He can't._ "I don't know what you're talking about," I defended quickly.

"Cut the crap, Bella. I know that you know what they are. Stop trying to defend them! He left you. He's not coming back. He doesn't want you anymore," he spat in my face.

I couldn't breathe. Everything was catching up to me. I clutched at my chest and gasped for air. Wrapping my left arm around my stomach, I closed my eyes and tried to relieve myself of the anger I was feeling.

"I know that," I whispered. "It sure doesn't seem like you want me either, so why the hell would you care?" I yelled at him.

"Don't. Do. That," he growled out each word. _Growled?_

"Do what?" I snapped.

"Your arm. Don't wrap it around your stomach like tha – " he was cut off mid-sentence as his eyes zeroed in on my arm. He pried my left arm off of my stomach and stared furiously at it. "What the hell have you been doing to yourself?" he hissed. My eyes widened. I had forgotten to wear a jacket over my tanktop.

I felt ashamed. I tried to jerk my arm from his grasp but he kept it in place. The tears in my eyes finally escaped. "I cut myself every time I think about how I'm not wanted. It feels good to know that I can still feel pain, even in my numbest state. I hope you're proud of yourself Jake. I do this because of you," I whispered callously at him.

"Don't tell me that," he choked out. _The fuck I won't!_

"But it's true! You promised me you were going to wait for me. I told you I was almost there. Have you already gotten tired of waiting for me? I hurt myself in memory of you. I love you! Can't you see that?" I shouted back.

I gasped realizing what I had just told him. I love him. _I'm in love with Jacob Black._ "Say it again," he pleaded. I shook my head.

"I'm only hurting myself Jake. I'm tired of hurting. I just want to get all this over with. Tell me you don't want me anymore. Push me away! Tell me yourself and I'll be leaving," I begged him. More tears were falling from my eyes. _Just get it over with._

"Say it again," he begged, disregarding what I had just told him. His eyes were closed, seemingly trying to stop the tears from escaping his own eyes.

"Jake, please, just leave me alo – "

"Say. It. Again," he grounded out.

"I love you," I finally whispered, both mine and his resolves were finally broken.

With that, he grabbed the back of my neck and crashed our lips together. My arms accordingly wrapped themselves around his neck. I felt his heart and soul flow through me with the kiss. His hands grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to his body. Probing my lips, I gave him access to my mouth. I tangled my fingers in his hair and refused to let him go.

"I love you too," he murmured against my lips. "I never stopped," he assured before kissing me back again.

I pulled away and looked into his eyes searchingly. "Then why – " he stopped me with another sealing kiss. Cupping my cheeks, he forced me to stare back into his deep, intense eyes.

"Leave your window open tonight," he told me. I nodded in agreement and he placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. "I love you," he whispered before disappearing into the forest.

I hurriedly ran back into my car. After getting in, I stayed seated in the driver's seat with my hands clenched on the steering wheel. There were no other thoughts that consumed my head as I drove home. The only thing I could think of was:

_He still loves me._

**WHOO! How's that for a chapter 6? Is it starting to get interesting for you?**

**Thanks for all the REVIEWS you guys, but PLEASE keep them coming!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	7. Hold Me

Chapter 7: Hold Me

**Bella POV**

I anxiously waited for him to come. All I've done is busy myself with house chores. Charlie seemed to be surprised by my sudden change of mood, but he left it alone. I silently thanked him for not prying. No matter what I did, I just couldn't keep my eyes off of the clock. It's nearly nine pm now. _How much longer am I going to have to wait?_

"I'm going to crash Bella. Will you be okay?" Charlie asked.

"I'll be okay," I assured him. He walked over to me and crushed me to his chest.

"Whatever's happening between you and Jake, I hope you guys work it out," he whispered in my ear. I nodded. He sighed and trudged up the stairs. I let out a sigh of relief. I was glad he didn't press on further with the cutting issue.

Deciding that it was late enough, I turned off all of the lights downstairs and headed up into my room. I got changed into a pair of navy blue sweat pants and a black tank top. My nerves were wrecking. _Get a hold of yourself Bella. It's only Jake._ I tied my hair up in a loose pony tail and did the rest of my necessities.

_10:30_. I groaned and got on my bed. I could already hear Charlie's deafening snores.

_He's not going to come._

I jumped slightly when I heard a loud thump on my bedroom floor. Next to my ancient computer stood Jacob Black, in all his glory. "Jake," I whispered.

He almost immediately made his way over to me and crushed me to his chest. "You have no idea how much I've missed you," he breathed into my hair. "I'm sorry for all the things I said. I promise I didn't mean any of it," he apologized. I sighed and relaxed the creases on his forehead.

"It's okay Jake, but you need to tell me what's going on," I told him.

"Here's the thing, I'm a wol – " and just like that, his mouth closed shut. I don't even think it was on his own accord.

"You can't tell me?" I asked softly. He clenched his eyes shut. I lifted my hand up and caressed his face. Soon enough, he was once again relaxed.

"No, I can't," he replied painfully, "What makes it worse, is that you already know it Bella. Can't you remember?" I looked at him in confusion and shook my head. He cupped my cheeks and forced me to look in his eyes. "You have to remember. What did I tell you about my tribe's ancestors that day at the beach?" he asked me. I tried to recall the things he told me but nothing would come up.

"All I can remember is the Cold One's," I answered.

"Of course that's all you would remember," he muttered harshly. _Damn it._

"Can you stop this? This isn't you. What happened to my sunny-all-the time Jacob?" I pleaded with him.

"A lot can happen in two weeks Bella. I'm not the same anymore," he replied sadly. He was stroking my hair gently with a focused expression.

"I know that somewhere deep inside you, _my_ Jacob is still there. Don't let him fade away. Please," I whispered. He gave me a small, curt nod.

"I love you Bella. I still do. Please try to remember," he begged. I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him to me. "Bella?" he asked.

"Just hold me," I murmured. I heard him sigh before wrapping his arms around me. I leaned closer into his touch and closed my eyes. His musky scent brought me back to the day at the beach.

"_The Protectors of our tribe made a treaty with the bloodsuckers, the Cullens"_

"_Members of our tribe are supposedly descendants of wolves"_

"_Our tribe's ancestors were what we call Shape-shifters. Men that could transform into wolves"_

My eyes snapped open. "Wolves," I whispered. Jake tensed under me for the slightest bit, before beaming into a huge, bright smile.

"You remember!" he exclaimed happily.

"I remember," I smiled brightly before jumping back into his arms.

"Do you still want me?" he asked sadly.

I cradled his face between my hands and rested our foreheads against each other. "I don't think I could ever not want you Jake. You burst into a furry wolf at random times, who cares? I still love you," I declared.

"You really do love me?" he asked lowly. _Silly boy._

"I really, really do," I smiled softly. He grinned at me happily.

"I love you too," he murmured before kissing me again. _How did I survive without kissing him like this?_

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I plunged my tongue inside his mouth and explored him. His fingers intertwined behind my back as he pulled me closer to his body. I had to get on my tippy-toes to be able to kiss him better. He had gotten much taller for his own good.

His lips were so warm. _So soft._ He nibbled on my lower lip and I couldn't help but give out a moan. I pushed myself closer to his touch and he just willingly obliged. "I love you," I murmured, "I love you." I pulled away and placed a butterfly kiss on his nose. "I love you," I breathed out once again.

"I never thought I'd ever hear you say that to me," I felt his smile on my skin. He buried his head in my hair and I sensed him sniffing my scent. I rested my head on his shoulder and sighed.

"Is that why you couldn't talk to me?" I finally asked.

"I was scared Bella. When you're a young wolf, you don't have a very good sense of control. If I was to get mad, even just the slightest bit, I could have hurt you. I could never live with myself if I ever hurt you physically," he replied through gritted teeth.

"I know that you would never hurt me Jacob," I assured him.

"That's the exact same thing Emily said to Sam. One day, he got mad and she was way too close. Now, he has to live with the fact that Emily is permanently scarred, and it's all because of him," I felt him clench his fist.

"Calm down," I soothed, taking his hands into my own. He relaxed under my touch and he muttered a thank you before kissing me on the forehead. "You see? You can't hurt me," I said softly, placing a kiss on his lips.

"You're so good with weird," he chuckled.

"When you're a danger magnet, that tends to happen," I joked lightly. He held me back into his arms.

"I still can't believe that you're actually here," he whispered.

"I'll always be here," I vowed.

He breathed out a sigh of relief. "Let's get you to sleep," he announced.

"Will you stay?" I asked hopefully. I saw the hesitance in his eyes. "You don't have to," I quickly contradicted.

"No, no. I'll stay," he smiled at me. I tucked myself in the bed and patted the spot next to me. "There's no way we're going to fit in that," he laughed.

"Guess we'll just have to hold onto each other for dear life?" I suggested with a grin.

"Guess so," he agreed, smiling.

He laid on the bed with me, making it a tight fit. Our position ended up with me curling into his warm body while his arms were kept at my waist, holding me tight. I sighed contently and buried my head against his chest. I felt him tracing patterns on the cuts that were on my left arm.

"Don't ever cut yourself again," he said in a stern voice. I felt shame pool in my stomach. I weakly nodded. Suddenly, I felt something warm and wet drop on my neck. Confused, I looked up to see Jake with trails of tears down his cheeks.

"What's wrong?" I asked softly as I wiped his tears away.

"God Bella, I can't believe that I'm the one that did this to you. I can never forgive myself," he replied through gritted teeth.

"Stop," I ordered him. "I was just being stupid, okay? This was not your fault," I contradicted him firmly.

"But – " I cut him off by placing my lips on his. His grip on my body got tighter.

"No buts. It's not your fault and that's the end of it," I interrupted.

"Okay," he replied, defeated.

"Good," I managed to give him a small smile.

"Can I do anything for the time we lost?" he asked hopefully.

"Just hold me," I whispered, before completely melting my body against his. I heard him let out a sigh, but he tightened his grip on me. He placed one last kiss on my forehead, before closing his eyes along with me. With his comforting warmth and love, I was able to sleep. _Nightmare-free._

**Charlie POV**

Without needing an alarm clock, I automatically got out of bed at around three am. That was usually the time that Bella had her nightmares. Surprisingly, I still hadn't heard her scream one bit. Worried, I bounded over to her room and carefully opened the door. I felt my heart clench at the sight before me.

Bella and Jake were sleeping peacefully in each other's arms.

For the first time, Bella actually looked peaceful. _Happy._

I was seriously going to do some damage to that boy, especially after what he made Bella go through. Seeing this, everything goes out the window. I can see that he's the only one that can save her now. He loves her. I can tell. She loves him too, but she's got to learn how to let go of that fucker first.

_Keep holding on, Bella._

**Jacob POV**

In the middle of the night, I heard the door of Bella's bedroom squeak open. _Crap. Charlie._ I was shocked when I heard it close back up. There was no doubt that he saw us, but he let it go. _Just like that?_ Bella may forgive me, but I would greatly appreciate it if Charlie yelled at me and made me feel horrible. _As if I didn't already._

I can't believe that she started cutting herself. Depressed or not, she shouldn't damage her body like that. She's frail and fragile enough as it is. What hurts the most is that I was the one who caused her to do that. _Jake, you fucking idiot!_

I wanted to kill myself the moment my eyes landed on her scars. I saw that one of them was still fresh and I knew that she had just recently cut herself. _She cut herself._ Because of me.

I also wanted to beat the living shit out of the rest of the guys. I wouldn't have had to stay away from her if only they didn't order me to. True, I was mad that she knew about the bloodsuckers, but it was something that I knew would eventually blow over. Like Bella said, I could never hurt her physically, even if I tried. _Okay, so maybe the scars were physical, but they weren't inflicted on by me._

Still holding her small body, I looked over to her and smiled. Her face was flushed red from the heat rolling off of my body and her hair was a matted mess. _She looks beautiful._

As I continued staring at her face, I heard the howl of one of my pack brothers. I scowled but did not move from my spot. I don't think I could anyways. Bella had tightened her grip on me as if she heard the howl as well.

_Well, you know what? Screw you guys! You're the reason I was ripped away from Bella in the first place. I'm staying here with her and you'll just have to deal with it._

The howl was not a cry for help, but it was a howl that meant they were searching for someone. _Someone, meaning me._ I shook my head and decided that I wasn't going to do crap. Let them search for me all night if they want to. _I. Am. Not. Leaving._

Not again.

Even with my keen senses, I didn't hear someone approaching so I jumped slightly when someone knocked loudly on Bella's window. Seeing who it was, I groaned lowly and flipped him off before burying my head into Bella's hair. _Hmmm, strawberries._

"What the fuck do you think you're doing Jake?" Paul asked angrily.

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**


	8. One of a Kind

**ANGST WARNING!**

Chapter 8: One of a Kind

**Bella POV**

"I knew Jake wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut," Embry threw his head back in a laugh.

"Shut up. For the record, I wasn't a wolf at the time so technically, I didn't break any rules," Jake grinned smugly at the whole Pack. I chuckled slightly and pushed myself closer to his side.

Ever since Paul found Jake and I sleeping together, the whole Pack has been bugging Jake to bring me over. At first, Jake had refused but I told him that I didn't mind. In fact, I was a bit excited to meet them despite the not-so-great first meeting we all had. He ended up smiling at me brightly. It turns out that he really did want to introduce me to them, but he didn't know if I would want to.

"I guess you're not as bad as I thought you were," Paul smirked, "It takes a lot of guts to stand up to us."

"I was pissed off," I stated bluntly. The Pack burst into laughter.

"You're so hard core Bella," Jared laughed.

A beautiful woman emerged from the kitchen, bounding over to Sam's side. She had three long scars down the side of her face but it didn't erase her beauty. So this is the Emily Jake was talking about. Sam's fiancé.

"So, you're Bella," Emily smiled at me.

"And you're the wolf girl?" I grinned at her.

Sam smiled warmly at me. I think he liked the fact the Emily and I got along with each other.

"Just as you're the vamp girl?" she joked. I managed not to wince, but I could tell that Jake saw my involuntary action. Emily hesitated. "Well, I guess you're a wolf girl now too."

I nodded and was able to give her a small smile. _Guess we're back to forced smiles._

"Well," Paul started, breaking the awkward moment.

"How'd you react when you found out that Jake's a wolf?" Jared asked curiously. The tension in the room quickly evaporated. _Thank God._

My eyes twinkled with a bit of humor. I looked up and met Jake's gaze. His lips curled up into a smile. "I said, 'so what?' and practically kissed him wherever I could," I replied with a small grin. Jake's grip on my waist tightened before he placed a kiss on my forehead.

"God Bella, you are way too cool," Embry grinned.

"I know right?" I smirked at him. Sam burst into laughter.

"I think you'll fit in very well with us Bella," he stated with a gentle smile.

"Thanks Sam," I replied sincerely.

"She's a keeper alright," Jake whispered in my ear. I burst into a bright smile and beamed up at him.

Like I said, I'm never going to be able to not love Edward but it doesn't mean that I can't give all I am to Jake. He's the one that holds my heart now. He knows that I'm still fragile and that he needs to be careful when handling me. I love that about him.

I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face against him.

"Hey Bella, do you mind helping me cook?" Emily asked softly. I looked at her before looking back at Jake.

"Go ahead. We need to have a Pack meeting anyway," he smiled. I pecked his lips gently before bounding over to Emily.

"What do you need help with?" I asked her. I heard the guys, including Jake, piling outside of the house.

"Nothing really," she smiled sheepishly, "I just wanted to get to know you better."

"Emily, you liar," I teased. She laughed along with me.

"How are things between you and Jake?" she asked, trying to start a conversation.

"We've been together for about a week now," I replied proudly.

"It took him a week to introduce you to us?" she asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah, I guess. We wanted our relationship to be in a good stature, you know? We're doing really well. I don't think I could have asked for anyone better than Jake," I smiled subconsciously, thinking about Jake's face.

"He really does love you, you know. Imprint or not," she commented with a gentle smile. _Imprint?_

"Thanks but what exactly is an imprint?" I asked curiously.

She looked panic stricken. "Nevermind," she tried to dismiss, but I didn't allow her. _What's so bad about this imprint thing that she won't tell me about it?_

"Come on, it can't be that bad," I tried to persuade.

'Jake's going to kill me for this,' I heard her mutter under her breath. I raised my eyebrow slightly. "Take me, for example, I'm Sam's imprint," she started to explain, "It's like, when their eyes land on you, nothing else matters for them anymore. The imprint holds their world and is the reason for their existence. It's like love at first sight but _more._ Soul mates. They're perfect for each other in every single way." Fear washed throughout my whole body.

When she finished, I felt like I was going to pass out. My head was starting to spin and everything was getting blurry. Weakened, I grabbed onto a kitchen counter and tried to steady myself. "Oh my god Bella, are you okay?" Emily shrieked in terror.

"Has J-Jake i-imprinted?" I managed to get out.

"No! Of course not!" she yelled quickly.

I tried to take deep breaths to calm myself. Soon enough, my vision was perfect again and the first thing my eyes landed on was an anguished Jacob. I was in his arms immediately. "What happened?" he demanded from Emily.

"It's not her fault," I whimpered.

"Well, it has to be someone's for you to get like this!" he shouted quickly. His body shook against mine terribly.

"Calm down Jacob," Sam tried to order but it seemed as though Jake was too angry to care.

"She asked me Jake. I couldn't lie to her," Emily cried.

"It's not her fault," I repeated grabbing a hold of his face. "I asked her and she gave me an answer. I just panicked," I admitted forlornly.

"About what?" he snapped.

"Imprint," I whispered. His eyes widened with horror.

"We'll leave you guys to talk," Jared said quickly. Soon enough, Jake and I were alone in the house.

"Bella, I wasn't – I was going to tell you," he pleaded with me. _When?_

Unexpectedly, rage racked through my body, replacing the fear I felt earlier.

"When? When exactly would you have told me? When you've actually already imprinted? 'Oh hey Bella, I just imprinted today, you don't know what that means, but I don't love you anymore.' Well? Why didn't you tell me?" I shouted while pounding his chest. He let out a cry before grabbing both of my wrists.

"I'm not going to imprint Bella. You're my one and only. No one could ever take your place," he declared sincerely. _I want to believe him. I really do, but I can't._

"You can't be sure of that. Just one look, Jake. That's all it would take for you to be ripped away from me! I can't – I won't survive it!" I yelled, tears escaping my eyes.

I gasped for air as I thought about the possibility of him not loving me anymore.

"If I do imprint – " I interrupted him, not wanting him to press further into the issue.

"I don't want to hear it!" I begged, covering both of my ears with my hands. I tried to get away from him but he didn't let me.

He grabbed onto my waist and pulled me back, crashing our lips together. I fought against him terribly, but he kept me in place by holding onto my face. My resolve was broken when I couldn't fight against him any longer. My lips, now gentle, melted against his own. I placed my hands on his chest and traced his body.

Meanwhile, he had finally let go of my face and instead wrapped them around my waist. Dipping inside my shirt, his calloused fingers caressed the skin under it. I arched my body against him and willed for him to touch me further. His lips pulled away for the slightest moment to murmur 'I love you' before placing it back on mine.

"Just listen to me," he said breathlessly. "You're right, I won't be able to stop it from happening," he finally agreed. I felt my stomach drop at his statement. I had the need to pull myself together so I wrapped my arm on my stomach, but Jake pried it away. Though gentle, I whimpered. He tilted my chin up and forced me to look him in the eyes. "But I can and will fight against it. I told you that you are worth it Bella. I'll fight for you tooth and nail if I ever happen to imprint. I just got you and I'm never letting you go," he vowed fiercely.

My eyes watered at his declaration. It was the sweetest and most sincere thing anyone's ever said to me. "I'll take whatever amount of time I have with you," I whispered, kissing him once again.

"Don't say that. You'll have forever with me," he contradicted. I nodded with tears falling out from my eyes. Realization hit me and I let out a small laugh before burying myself into his chest. "Why are you laughing?" he asked in confusion.

"We just had our first fight as a couple," I pointed out with a small giggle.

"You are so weird Bella Swan," he smiled gently at me.

"And that was the sweetest and most sincere thing anyone's ever said to me," I added, gazing back into his eyes. It held so much emotion in them that I couldn't find it in myself to pull away. It was almost as if he could see through my soul.

"I love you Bella. Never ever doubt that," he finally said, planting a soft kiss on my lips.

"I love you too," I replied with a cheesy grin. He sighed and buried his face in my hair.

"I can never get tired of how you smell," he murmured. My body vibrated into laughs. _I could say the same._

"Strawberries, right?" I teased. He nodded against me. I stroked his hair gently and smiled unconsciously.

"I have to apologize to Emily. I shouldn't have snapped at her like that," he said guiltily.

"Yeah, you shouldn't have," I agreed. He whined into my hair and I couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sorry," I added quickly.

"You should be," he muttered.

"Come on, let's get you apologizing," I chuckled, grasping his hand.

We walked out of the house hand in hand and saw that the whole Pack was waiting for us outside. They all had shit-eating grins on their faces. They obviously heard every single word that was passed between me and Jake.

"So much for leaving us alone, huh?" I laughed at them. They shamelessly smiled back at me.

"I'm sorry Jake. I wasn't in the right place to tell her about it – " Jake cut Emily off immediately.

"No Emily. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have shouted at you like that. I had no right. It was inexcusable but I was panicking too, you know," he gave her a small smile.

"It's okay," she smiled back.

"If she forgives you, then so will I," Sam agreed with a small nod. He threw me a smile which I happily returned.

"Yup," I clapped my hands, "We're all good."

"Well that was quick. Just a minute ago, you were about ready to rip Jake's balls off," Jared teased with a laugh.

"We gotta move forward, right?" I asked, looking at Jake adoringly.

"Right," he breathed out. He pulled me to his body and rested our foreheads against each other.

"Eww, gross. Keep your PDA to yourselves," Embry fake gagged.

"Shut up Embry," Jake spat at him without tearing his gaze away from me. I tried to obscure my smile, but I failed miserably.

"So Jake," Paul started.

"Yeah?"

"How good is Bella in bed exactly?" he asked with no shame. Jake's gaze finally tore away from me as he chased after Paul. I blushed a deep red at his question. _God, we've never even had sex yet! Yet? Yes…. yet. _

"I'm going to fucking kill you Paul!" he yelled so loudly, that I think the all of La Push heard it. _Hell, maybe even Forks._

I laughed and smiled brightly. "You two sure are one of a kind," Emily commented.

**Phew! Glad that we got over the whole imprinting thing... for now :DDDD**

**LALALALALALALA forget I even said that xD**

**Anyways, don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	9. Not Fair

**SORRY FOR THE DELAY! I was in Las Vegas for the whole week and had NO INTERNET ACCESS. This is actually the first time I've gotten online since last Saturday. SORRY AGAIN!**

**To make it up to you, I'll have Chapter 10 by Wednesday! PROMISE!  
**

Chapter 9: Not Fair

**Jake POV**

"I've got to go to the guys, right now," I told Bella in a hurry.

"What's going on?" she asked worriedly.

"Sam was the one who called me. Apparently, more people just phased today," I replied to her. She gasped and looked at me with sadness.

"Will they be alright?" she asked with genuine compassion.

"They will be. Look Bells, I gotta run," I gave her an apologetic expression.

"Go," she whispered, pushing me in the direction of her window.

"Love you," I quickly added as I pecked her lips.

I jumped out of the window and phased immediately. I heard her whisper 'I love you' back. I let out a loud yip to let her know that I had heard her.

_How is she doing?_ I asked the guys.

_Not very we – _Embry was cut off by a loud growl.

_I can't believe I lost you to Emily because of some magic Quileute bullshit! _Leah growled at Sam.

_Leah, just calm dow_ – Sam pleaded.

_How the hell can I? Because of me, my dad is probably dying right now! And then I find out about all this fuckload of shit! _She yelled at him.

My eyes widened as I took in what she had said. _What? What about Harry?_ I asked everyone.

_He had a heart attack after seeing Leah phase in front of him_. Jared answered unhappily.

_Leah? Can you hear me?_ I asked.

_Yes, asswipe. Of course I can hear you. _She spat sarcastically.

_I know that this sucks, but you have to calm down or else you'll be like this for a while. _I explained to her. Now that, caught her attention.

_Are you saying that I'll stay like this?_ She shrieked in horror.

_Yes, exactly._ I answered.

_Okay, okay. Fine. _She muttered, defeated.

_How the fuck did you do that? z _Paul asked me in sheer disbelief. _We've been trying to make her calm down for the past hour._

_You got to know their weaknesses. We all know that Leah would rather jump off a cliff than stick around and listen to Sam's thoughts. _I explained smugly.

_I'm still here, you know. _Leah spat angrily.

_So am I. _Sam growled. I rolled my eyes at both of them.

_Shut up, Sam. Quite frankly, no one cares. _Leah added.

Sam was about to come up with a snappy comeback but I gave him a look that told him to stop or it will just make the situation worse. He understood.

_Just calm down, and phase back already. _Sam grunted.

_What do you think I'm doing? _She retorted mockingly.

Sam just bit his tongue back.

_This is so freaking cool! _I heard Seth exclaim.

_You're taking this rather well. _Jared commented.

_Are you kidding? It's cool at first, and then you have do patrols. _Paul groaned. Everyone else nodded in agreement.

_Eh, whatever. _Seth still beamed. We all rolled our eyes at him before checking on Leah's progress.

_Leah?_ We all asked.

Silence.

_Hmm, I guess she phased back. _Embry mused.

_No, shit._ Paul muttered sarcastically.

_You think you'll be okay, Sam?_ I asked.

_No. _He answered, short and clipped. Immediately after, he phased back and ran away.

_This is really going to suck for him. _Jared sighed sadly.

_He deserves it. _Seth muttered.

_You know that he couldn't help it Seth. It wasn't in his control. _I reminded him.

He let out a sigh of understanding. _I know. I just – I wish he would have at least tried to fight for Leah._ He added before running away.

_Ahh, shit. This pack is just full of drama, isn't it?_ Paul snorted.

_Agreed._ Embry nodded.

_Well, since Leah, Seth, and Sam practically ditched us, I guess we can all just go home now. We can explain the rules to them at tonight's bonfire._ I informed the guys.

_Sounds good to me._ Jared replied, thinking about Kim.

_And that is my cue to leave. _Paul commented before phasing back.

_See you guys later. _I said, running back towards Bella.

As I approached her house, I phased back and untied my shorts from my ankles, putting them on. I looked up and thought about jumping in through her window but as I looked, I realized that she wasn't up there, so I decided to just knock on the front door.

She came out looking flustered with her hair out in all different places. I didn't even bother to cover up my laughter. "Jake!" she exclaimed with a grin, throwing her arms around me.

"What happened to you Bells? You look like you just ran a marathon," I joked as I returned her hug.

"Oh! I was umm….. uhh," she looked at me, at lost for words. Her cheeks instantly turned red.

"Well?" I asked with a small smirk plastered onto my face.

"You see, I was getting ready to take a shower and I already had all my clothes off and then you rang the door bell so I put on my clothes as fast as I – " I cut her off with a loud groan.

_Bella. No clothes. Naked. Shower._

"Yeah, I get it," I stammered. Her face flushed and she gave me a sheepish smile.

"What happened out there?" she finally asked, her eyebrows scrunching down in worry.

"Seth and Leah phased today," I answered with a small sigh. Her eyes began to prickle with tears. She plopped down on the couch and then ran her hand through her hair, her mouth open in a silent gasp.

"How is Sam? Leah?"

"They're not getting along real well," I replied.

"What about Seth? He's only thirteen!" she exclaimed.

"We don't know what's going on Bells. They're starting to phase early. Seth's the youngest we've ever had," I told her.

"Isn't this going to complicate the Pack?"

"Greatly," I muttered. I sat down next to her and rested my head on her shoulder. She brought her hand up and began stroking my hair.

"Jake, what would happen if we ended up like Sam, Leah, and Emily?" she asked. My eyes widened and I pulled away from her.

"What?"

"I just – I'm not your imprint. What if someone like Emily comes along and then you'd leave me just like Sam did to Leah?" she looked up at me through glazed eyes. I grabbed her hands and forced her to look at me.

"Bells, I'm not Sam. Unlike him, I'd fight it, because I know that I can. He was the first to imprint and because of that he didn't know that he could have possibly fought it off. Even if he did know, I'm not weak like him. I have the strength and power to fight the imprint," I persuaded her. She sniffed slightly and tore her gaze from me.

"You know, I love you so much that I'm willing to let you go if you do imprint. I wouldn't want you to struggle against what fate had decided for you," she informed without looking at me.

I couldn't help but feel my heart clench at her words. _She wouldn't fight for me? She'd let me go? Just like that?_

"You'd let me go, just like that?" I seethed, clenching my fists in anger.

"Just like that," she whispered as she fiddled with her fingers, "I don't want to be like Leah. I'm not going to resent you or hate you for something that you can't control. I'd understand, because unlike her, I'll know why it happened before it even does."

"You wouldn't fight for me?" I stammered, standing up as I pulled away from her. She gasped and finally looked into my eyes, realizing what I had actually been feeling.

"God no, Jake! That's not what I mean!" she glanced at my accusing eyes, standing up. "Can you tell me that I would win against your imprint if she'd already won the moment you looked into her eyes? I'll just suck it up and let you be with her," she said, cupping my cheeks with both of her hands. "You would be torn apart in trying to choose between me and her. I'd rather have myself hurt than see you go through that. Do you understand me?"

I shook my head violently. "I would be willing to fight for you Bella. I'm willing to give my life for you. I'm willing to tear apart my soul to be with you. I'm willing to give my wolf and make my non-existent imprint suffer just so that you could be happy. I'm willing to do all these things for you, but you're not even willing to fight for me when the slightest bit of interference gets between us?" I spat at her. "It's not fair!"

"It's not fair that you don't belong to me Jacob! That's what's not fair! It's not fair that someday you're going to belong to another girl and it's not going to be me! You can get off saying that I won't fight for you because maybe it's the truth. Because just like you, I'd give away everything that belongs to me: my life, my soul, my heart, _you_, to never see you go through that kind of pain. It's not fair to me either!" she thumped my chest repeatedly in anger.

Her anger turned into sadness and she fell limp against me, crying her heart out. "It's not fair," she whimpered, continuously sobbing.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and cried along with her. "I love you Bella. Please, fight for me," I begged. Her frail arms wrapped around me too, holding on to me as if I was her lifeline.

"I don't want to lose you Jake. I never want you to belong to anyone else but me. I would fight off anything for you, but I would never win against an _imprint_," she cried awfully.

"Yes you would," I growled, "I would never be happy in the hands of another woman, Bella. My happiness lies with you and if the fucking Quileute Gods can't see that, then they're a bunch of ignorant assholes."

"I hate them, all of them, for doing this to all of you. I hate that none of you ever have a choice. Not even in love," she whispered against my chest.

"I hate them too," I agreed with her. I felt her nod on my skin.

"I'll fight for you Jake. I promise you that, but I can't promise that I'll win," she explained grudgingly.

"That's more than enough," I sighed, breathing in her scent. "This imprint thing is going to slowly tear us apart. Can't we just drop it?" I pleaded with her.

"Fine," she agreed, burying herself into me.

I decided to finally change the subject. "There's a bonfire tonight. Do you want to come?" She nodded her head in agreement.

**Bella POV**

Jake and I arrived at the bonfire an hour early. I finally agreed to drop the issue of imprinting but I could still feel it lingering in the air. I didn't like thinking about losing Jake. I couldn't bear thinking of another person who'd _leave_ me.

He and I parted ways, him going to the buffet table, and me sitting on the shore. I didn't hear anyone walking so I jumped slightly in surprise when a figure plopped down on the sand, next to me. "Hey," Leah grunted.

I blinked furiously. Why would Leah want to talk to me? From what Jacob told me, Leah felt some unadulterated hate towards me though she's only seen me through the Pack's memories for a mere few minutes. He said it had something to do with me not being an imprint.

"Hi," I squeaked.

"I hate you, you know," she stated bluntly.

"What?" I stammered in confusion. "What did I do?"

"I hate that Jacob's fighting for you and chooses you even though he knows that he's going to imprint someday. I hate you because you have someone that loves you enough to fight for you," she answered, her voice void of emotion.

"Leah, I'm sorry. I didn't – " she cut me off with a wave of her hand.

"Don't say 'I'm sorry' to me. That's what everyone always says and I'm sick of it. Sometimes it's best if they just leave you alone because sympathy doesn't always do shit," she cussed.

"I hate imprinting too you know, maybe just as much as you," I sighed. She looked at me in disbelief.

"Why the hell should you? You know that Jake would fight for you if it came down to it. That's all that matters," she nearly hissed.

"Yeah, he would fight for me, but that doesn't make it any better because between you and me, we both know that he'd already lost the fight the moment he looks into _her_ eyes," I defended, tears prickling my eyes.

"Would you let him go?" she asked. _What?_

"Excuse me?"

"If he was to imprint, would you let him go? Because if he does, you do know that that's the only thing you can do: _let him go._ Jake is supposed to be the destined Alpha of the Pack, not Sam. And as the rightful Alpha, he can't be focusing his mind and soul on fighting against the imprint. He should be focusing on his duties to the Pack," she explained to me.

"I know," I choked out. "I told him that I would let him go if need be, and I still mean that. But – " Leah cut me off with a sneer.

"But what?" she asked sharply.

"I promised him that I would fight for him just as he would fight for me, but I know that it would be useless. I'm nothing against an imprint," I sniffed.

I looked at Leah and saw everything flash through her eyes: the pain, anger, resentment, _hurt._ "If I were you, make the best out of your time together. But you're going to be hurt. You'll be really hurt. Nothing can compare to the feeling of your one, true love leaving you. _Not loving you_," she whispered, letting silent tears slide down her cheeks.

I took a deep gulp and allowed myself to delve into the past that I had tried to forget.

"I've felt it before," I said in a hushed tone. Her head snapped towards me. _Here goes. _"When Edward left, I couldn't… I couldn't breathe, couldn't sleep, couldn't _function._ But when Jake came along, he fixed me up and patched me back together again," I informed her. We stayed in silence for a few seconds until I asked, "Do you want to know what scares me the most?" She just stared at me with cold, glazed eyes and then slowly nodded.

"If Jacob was to imprint and my heart shatters into pieces again, who'd be the one to fix me that time? When Edward left, Jacob was the one to fix me, but what if he leaves too? I don't know anyone else in the world who has a patience like Jacob's. No one else would stick by a broken, fragile girl with hopes of one day fixing her again," I answered bitterly. _Oh God, why did I bring this up again?_ Tears rimmed my eyes once more.

She still hadn't responded but instead stared at me, as if trying to see if I had been telling the truth. With a small sigh, she finally talked. "I guess we have a lot more in common than I thought, except unlike you, I don't have someone like Jake and I don't think I ever will," she laughed humorlessly.

"You know Leah, someday the right person will come along and patch you together again just like Jacob did to me," I assured her.

"You sure about that?" she asked. "Like you said, there's no other person in the world like Jake," she cried. Reluctantly, I scooted over and gave her a hug. "What are you doing?" she asked, a small sob escaping her lips.

"You can cry Leah. It's okay," I soothed, stroking her hair. And so, she cried on my shoulder. She cried for the first time since Sam left her. She let out all the hurt and anger she's felt all throughout the months.

"Everyone keeps telling me to stay strong, that I shouldn't keep crying for him because he'll never come back to me," she sobbed. I felt my heart break for Leah, but I feared that someday I was going to be just like her. Resentful, angered, _hurt and broken beyond repair._

"Sometimes, crying helps," I whispered in her ear.

After a couple minutes of crying, she finally recovered and wiped the remaining tears off of her eyes. Her face was still red and blotchy but she had finally calmed down some.

"Thank you," she spoke softly in a sincere tone.

"You're welcome," I smiled at her.

"You shouldn't doubt Jake, but….." she trailed off and then looked deeply into my eyes, "if he does imprint, I'll be here for you. I know how it feels and I'll…. I'll do my best to help you get through it."

I gave her a thankful nod. "Do you still hate me?" I asked jokingly, trying to lighten the situation.

"Not anymore. I guess," she shrugged, a small smile playing on her lips.

"I know it will probably be hell being in Sam's mind, but know that I'm here for you too, okay?" I asked her. She nodded and, this time, was the one to give me a hug.

"It's not fair," she whispered.

"It's not fair," I agreed.

**Whoa! Leah and Bella... friends? Didn't see that one coming now did you? :D**

**Have you guys noticed a reoccurring theme in the story yet? Hmm... you should xD**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	10. Speechless

**A PROMISE IS A PROMISE :D**

Chapter 10: Speechless

**Bella POV**

Jake and I have been officially together for a month now. I had stopped the issue of imprinting from evading my mind once and for all. _Well, at least for now. Until the actual occasion arises….._ God, I've got to stop thinking like that.

"What's got you thinking so hard?" Jake asked from his position under the car.

"Nothing," I answered quickly.

"It sure doesn't seem like nothing," he defended. _Damn him and his stupid wolf perceptiveness._

"It's just – Look, I don't want to bring it up, okay? We've already talked about it," I replied. The deafening silence clued me in that he got exactly what I was thinking about. Letting out a sigh, I decided to change the subject immediately.

"How do you think those old women will take the news?" I joked slightly.

"I'm sure they'll manage. Ecstatic even," without seeing his face, I already knew that he was grinning.

Jake and I had finally decided to tell Charlie and Billy about our relationship. _If you could even call it one._ It feels more intense. _Much more real._

We both know that a month seems like such a long time, but we really wanted to be on good terms with each other, meaning no more unclear details, arguments, and _past loves._

_Yeah, we really had to get past those._

"You ready to go? It's about time for dinner," I asked him.

"Sure, sure," he replied easily. Walking over to him, I grabbed the rag next to his foot and handed it to him. "Thanks Bells," he added.

While he wiped off the grease from his hands, I couldn't help but stare at his lips. They looked so kissable. Believe it or not, we haven't kissed in nearly four days. I'm literally dying for just a taste of them. With the thought in mind, I sat on his lap and straddled him.

"Bells, what are you – " I cut him off with a hush.

"Four days is a long time to go without kissing your girlfriend, don't you think so?" I asked, closing the distance between our lips. A slow smile began to spread on his lips.

"Damn Bella," he breathed, "I thought you would never ask."

I pushed him so that he was forced to lay on his back. I finally placed my lips against his and nearly melted at the sensation. They were like soft cotton and he tasted so much like cinnamon. _Hot and spicy._

His hands wove their way underneath my shirt, caressing the sensitive skin under it. I giggled lowly, causing Jake to smile hugely at me. "Stop that," I murmured against his lips.

"What?" he asked innocently.

"You're tickling me," I pulled away momentarily to answer.

He took the chance to flip us over, causing me to hiss at the cold, hard floor. He dropped in and kissed me again. "Thanks for telling me your weak spot," he smiled against my lips.

"Anytime," I moaned, feeling his fingers glide through my skin. _This man can tickle me any day if this is the sort of reaction I'll get._

I placed my hands on his cheeks and pulled him closer to my lips. He had half of my body lifted off of the floor and pressed against his body. "We're going to be late for dinner," he whispered.

"Screw it," I contradicted.

"I'm beginning to think that you're some sexy vixen just waiting to come out and play," he teased with heavy lust and longing in his voice.

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" I asked seductively. _Whoa, whoa, whoa! Where has this side of Bella Swan been hiding this whole time?_

"That's not a question worth asking," he murmured, placing a kiss on the soft skin of my exposed shoulder. I tried to push myself closer to his scorching body but he kept pushing his distance. "We can't do this Bells," he breathed out.

"Come on, why not?" I whined.

He sighed and pushed me off of him. I couldn't help the tears that trickled at the corners of my eyes. _I'd never felt so rejected in my life_. Seeing them, Jake instantly looked worried and peppered my face with kisses.

"God, not that I don't want to! Just, not here, okay?" he asked softly, landing a gentle kiss on my forehead. I nodded against his lips.

"Let's go eat," I replied as I offered him a small smile.

Flashing his teeth, he beamed widely at me and helped me stand up.

"So, what's for dinner?" he asked casually as we walked towards his house.

"You," I joked with a smirk. He rolled his eyes and coughed a laugh at my pathetic excuse for an innuendo. Though I didn't show it, I was actually very frustrated at his lack of response.

_Who does he think he is? Just because he's hot, sexy, unbelievable fuckabl – _

_Wait, what was I trying to say? Damn it! I'm supposed to be mad!_

"Since when did you become so sexual?" Jake asked with curiosity obviously in his tone of voice. I narrowed my eyes at him, using it as a warning.

"Don't mind me, I'm just another hormonal teenage girl," I muttered sarcastically, "and you walking around half-naked all the time doesn't do shit."

"When the hell did you start cussing too?" he threw in another question, his eyebrows raised with amusement. I gave him an agitated look. Seeing the look is my eyes, I'm pretty sure he took the hint.

Right before we opened the door to the house, he leaned into my ear and whispered, "Well, don't stop. I kind of like it."

I stood there open-mouthed, gaping at his breath-taking comment. I didn't even have a chance to respond to it for he had already walked in half way into the house.

_Like I could've said anything anyways. I was __speechless.

* * *

_

"So what you're saying, is that you've been together for a month now?" Charlie asked amusedly.

"Yes! God Dad, that's what we've been trying to explain for nearly half an hour now!" I groaned irritably.

"Like, you know, together, _together?_" Billy asked as well with one of his eyebrows arched. I threw him an aggravated look. _That conniving man! I'm pretty sure he already knows about what's been going on between Jake and I. He's just using this as an excuse to tease me!_

"Yes!" Jake cried out in frustration, dragging the word out.

"Well, why didn't you just say so?" he asked with a smirk playing at the corner of his lips.

I smacked my forehead in annoyance.

Suddenly, I heard laughter coming from both men. "Chill out Bella. It's not every day that we can mess with you like this," my dad chuckled.

"You two are horrible," Jake commented, but even I could see the smile he was trying to conceal. _Traitor._

"Honestly, I'm glad. It's about time you two acknowledged _this_," Billy added as he gestured to both mine and Jake's bodies. "Speaking of," he turned to my dad with a triumphant smile, "you owe me twenty bucks, mister." I looked between the two of them in disbelief.

"Wait, what?" I asked in confusion.

"Stupid, all-knowing, smug – " Charlie muttered in his breath as he fished his pocket for his wallet. Handing Billy a twenty dollar bill, he faced me and Jake and explained. "We had a bet to see how long it would take for you to get together," he explained with an exasperated look.

"Then how did Billy win?" I asked with eyebrows raised.

"I bet that you guys were probably together already but just didn't have the guts to cough up the truth. He wouldn't believe me," Billy sang happily, obviously pleased at the easy money he had just made. "Besides, I doubt you could have handled my boy without one thought of kissing him," he added in with a smirk.

"Amen to that Father!" Jake praised from his spot. All three of them burst out laughing while I stood there scowling. "Umm, you know, I mean – Stop teasing Bells Dad!" he quickly added. _Smart boy. He knows what's good for him._

"Okay, okay, we'll stop," Charlie intervened, wiping away a few laughter tears from his eyes. Quickly, his eyes glazed over with seriousness. "But honestly, I'm happy that you're happy Bella."

"Thanks Dad," I replied appreciatively.

* * *

"How are Leah and Seth coping?" I asked as Jake and I walked on the gravelly ground outside of his house.

Charlie and Billy have already proceeded to watch their Mariner's game, easily forgetting the huge announcement we just gave them. Jake and I took the opportunity to catch up with each other's lives.

"Seth's okay. He's actually had the easiest transition in the whole pack. He finds it cool to be a wolf even with all the responsibilities. Leah is still having a hard time though, with Sam and all," he answered with a small, sad sigh. I decided to drop the subject.

Jake had explained the whole situation to me. As if I wasn't worried about imprinting enough, I just found out that no matter how much Sam loved Leah, it didn't stop him from imprinting on Emily.

Ever since Leah and I had that talk, she and I came to a silent understanding. She no longer resented and hated me like she had in the beginning. She told me that I was the only one throughout her whole suffering who had let her cry and not scolded her about it. I'm proud to say that I believe she and I will have a really good friendship in the future.

"Brady and Collin?"

"They're managing," he replied, short and clipped.

I've never felt so much sympathy towards anyone but those two boys. They phased merely days after Seth and Leah did. They're only 13 for God's sake! Seth may be the same age but at least his mom, Sue Clearwater, knows all about the Pack. Both Brady and Collin's parents think that they are doing _bad things._ Because of the Council's rules, their parents weren't allowed to know about anything. Life for the both of them has been so hard. Not only are they getting stress from Pack duties, their parents are adding strain to them.

"I just wish you all didn't have to endure this," I whispered depressingly.

"We don't really have much of a choice," he laughed without humor, kicking a small rock into the distance.

I took his hand and sat us on the back on my truck. Leaning my head on his shoulder, I closed my eyes and sighed.

"Do you think it will always be like this?" I asked.

"Us?" I nodded. "Yeah, I do think so," he gave me a small smile.

"But what if I'm old and wrinkly? Would you still love me?" I inquired. His eyes twinkled with happiness and amusement.

"What about when I'm old and wrinkly?" he retorted with a small smirk. I bobbed my head, answering 'yes.' "Same here, honey," he grinned.

Jake slipped our fingers together and intertwined them. Lifting our joined hands, he began to kiss my knuckles softly. I smiled at his loving gesture and pecked his lips.

"Bella?" he suddenly asked.

Abruptly, he stopped meeting my eyes and fixed his gaze in the forest. "Yeah?"

"Do you still love…. _him_?" he asked in an oddly calm voice. I blinked furiously, trying to process the question he had just asked. I didn't realize how long I had stayed silent until he asked the question again. "Do. You. Still. Love. Him?" he grounded out each word, his hands now terribly shaking.

"Yes," I whispered.

I could tell that he was struggling for control of his own body. He had jumped off of my truck and began pacing back and forth. _Geez, not in that way!_

"Why?" he asked in a pained cry.

"Jake, can you please calm down?" I pleaded.

"Calm down? How can I calm down when you're giving me all these false hopes of our future together when even after all this time, you still love him?" he spat at me.

"You know it's not like that," I defended quickly.

"Then tell me what it's like!" he snapped.

"Well maybe if you would stop jumping to conclusions and just listen to what I have to say then you'd understand!" I shot back.

He proceeded on punching a tree before calming down enough to give me the chance to explain.

"Alright then, explain," he said steely, crossing his arms.

"I love Edward, that will never change," I whispered. I looked up to gauge his expression and saw that he had indifference plastered onto his face. I took a deep breath and continued. "But I love you too. Not just brotherly love, but as in I'm in love with you. _He_ was my first love and he always will be. Nothing you do can change that. He'll always have a place in my heart, Jake, but it doesn't mean that he owns it, because my heart belongs to _you_. You should know that by now," I finished.

Before I could go into a further explanation, he already had me in his arms. "I'm sorry for being such an ass," he apologized quickly.

"We all have our moments Jake," I joked, letting him know that there was no harm done.

"You wanna know what I noticed?" he asked with a small smirk on his lips. I nodded my head. "Whenever we get into a fight, I'm always the one who ends up apologizing," he mused.

Laughter racked through my whole body. "Because I'm always right," I grinned at him.

"Guess so," he grinned, planting a kiss on the corner of my lips.

"So you promise you'll stop this Edward issue from getting to your head again?" I asked.

"I promise"

"Well, good," I replied as I took his hand into mine.

"Bells?" he asked again. I gave him a curious brow. "After you gave me that declaration, I was kind of speechless."

**You guys still there? I sure hope you are!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	11. Break It

**WARNING: This chapter may seem a bit off. It was just a scene that I randomly wrote a long time ago that I decided to put in. Consider this as whatever you want to: an outtake or a real chapter, it doesn't really matter. Anyways, READ ON!**

Chapter 11: Break It

**Jacob POV**

Fuckity fuck, fuck, fuck!

This girl is going to kill me.

"Is that even any good Bella?" Emily asked disgustingly, her nose scrunching up.

"Uhh, yeah? I love cherry flavored things," Bella stated bluntly, taking another lick. _Ahh, shit._

"But cherries are so…. eww," Emily contradicted.

"Contrary to what you say, cherries are _awesome_," Bella defended, slipping the 'devil's spawn' back into her mouth. I groaned.

_Oh shit, cherries __are__ fuck awesome!_

"I think I'm going to need a cold shower," Quil said quickly, running off.

"Me too," Embry whimpered, leaving us as well.

_Those shitholes!_

"What's their problem?" Bella asked cluelessly. _Oh God._

"Don't you think you've had enough?" I choked out.

"Mmm," she hummed. Her lips were red and so totally kissable, wrapped around that 'thing.' "No. I don't think so," she shrugged.

_I'd do anything to be that popsicle right now._

I was so hard it fucking hurt. Watching Bella wrap her mouth around that – _oohhh._

"E-Emily, please – oh shit," I stammered, seeing Bella swirl her tongue.

Emily's mouth popped open into an 'o.' She blushed deeply and nodded her head. "Yeah okay, well I'm going to go inside now," she announced before scrambling back in.

Immediately after, I pried the freaking popsicle from Bella and shoved it into my mouth. "Hey!" she protested. "I was eating that," she pouted.

"Eating? EATING?" I asked incredulously. "You were – You were like making out with it right in front of my face!" I accused with a groan. I realized that I had stood up, revealing the tent in my shorts.

"Oh," she muttered, her eyes landing on my crotch.

"Yeah, _oh_," I mocked sarcastically.

She blushed deeply and buried her face in her hands. "I didn't know!" she whined quickly. I let out a strangled cry and sat back down.

"It's not your fault that you're like walking sex," I grumbled, sitting cross-legged.

She moved a finger, revealing one eye. _She's so damn cute. _"Yeah?" she asked with a smirk.

"Oh hell yes," I grinned widely at her. She made her way to me slowly, kneeling in front of me. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her to me. "I was dying," I muttered onto the skin of her neck. I could've sworn that I saw a faint smile on her lips.

"Good," was all she replied. I pulled away and stared into her eyes.

"Good?" I asked in confusion.

"Yeah, well now you know how I feel when you walk around half-naked all the time," she answered bluntly. I was gaping at her in disbelief.

"You're serious?"

"Hell yeah, I'm serious. Do you have any idea how many times I've come so close to jumping your ass? I don't think so," she tisked, flicking my nose gently. _I didn't know she could be so evil!_

"You planned this whole thing out," I said, not asking a question.

"Well, I hadn't planned to give Embry and Quil a show, but it was just added on effect," she smirked while planting a kiss on my lips.

"When did you become so daring?" I asked seductively, laying her on the ground. I kissed her lips once, twice, a hundred freaking times.

Her heart beat increased beneath me and she could no longer breathe properly, oozing out breathless pants. Wrapping her arms around my neck, she'd pull me closer as if she couldn't get close enough. _Yeah, and I'm just willingly participating._

"Pretty much since I met you," she gasped breathlessly. I smirked, knowing I had that kind of effect on her. Almost immediately, I pulled away and started walking.

"Come on, I think Emily and the others are waiting for us," I stated, obviously trying not to laugh at the expression on her face, well, rather, _expressions._

She went from confusion, to embarrassment, to anger. "Y-you asshole! I can't believe you freaking did that!" she yelled loudly, all the while pointing a bony finger at me.

"I didn't say I would play fair," I smirked. She put forth a scowl on her face and I couldn't take it anymore. I broke out laughing. "Come on, you've got to admit, you're hella cute when you're mad," I wiggled my eyebrows.

She huffed and pushed past me into Emily's house. "Then I won't play fair either," I heard her mutter. _Oh fuck. Great job Black. You've done it now._

"I was just kidding!" I pleaded, following after her.

She turned around momentarily and glared at me. "Yeah, well I'm not!" she shot back loudly before leaving me.

_She's not playing. She really __is__ pissed off._

"Ouch! What did you do this time?" Paul asked placing a hand on my shoulder. I groaned, shrugging him off. He held up his hands defensively and laughed. "She actually seems _mad_," he smirked, walking into the kitchen.

"Just fuck her already, dammit!" Leah yelled from the living room.

"What?" I sputtered.

"I've got to agree with Leah on this one," Jared agreed.

"Hallelujah!" Leah thanked.

Quil and Embry walked back into the house. "Yeah, the sexual tension between you guys is getting to me," Embry grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose, "_real bad._"

"It makes me want to hump a couch," Quil shivered in disgust. _Not much of a surprise there._

"We're not that bad," I tried to defend. _I think._

"Are you shitting me Black? I can't even sleep anymore without dreaming about your Bella fantasies. You all know that Bella and I are sort of friends now, but I'm not fucking lesbian!" Leah spat. _Okay, so maybe we are._

"You sure about that Leah?" Collin teased.

"Don't tempt me," she growled. He merely smirked and took another bite of his hamburger.

"Seriously, I'm only 13 and because of you guys, my hormones are on overdrive," Brady added.

"Bella this, Bella that. 'Oh yeah baby, ride me just like that,'" Jared mocked. I narrowed my eyes at him and growled with my fists clenched tightly. It didn't bother him one bit. _Asshole._

"Stop pressuring him you guys! Let them take it at their own pace," Seth said in my honor. I threw him a thankful smile. _I knew there was a reason why I like him._

"Kiss ass," Jared muttered.

"No, I'm just not stupid," he stuck his tongue out. _Smart kid._

Sam just stood there with an eyebrow raised. _Oh yeah, he's all for the Plan._

"Go make up with her and then fuck her, have sex, or make love, whatever shit you two want to call it," Leah continued, obviously annoyed. _She's such a bitch._

"Fine, fine," I mumbled as I walked into the kitchen, in search of Bella.

She was already in sight, but she hadn't noticed my presence yet. She was sitting on the kitchen counter, all the while swinging her legs. She was humming to the tune of 'Pokerface' as she watched Emily cook.

_I really, really love that girl._

"Po-po-po-poker face Po-po-poker face," Emily sang in tune to Bella's hum with a laugh. Bella grinned at her, flashing her teeth.

"Current song of the day," she explained with a smile.

"What was yesterday's?" Paul asked with a mouth full of food.

"Rude boy," she smirked. Just like that, Paul spit out the food in his mouth. Bella and Emily laughed at him. He was still sputtering.

"That song is so demeaning to all men," he whined.

"Well, can you get it up?" Bella laughed. He growled at her playfully. "Just kidding," she sang.

"You are as dangerous as Jake says you are," he commented before walking back into the living room. At the mention of my name, her eyes darkened slightly. I gulped. _Yeah, she's still mad at me._

"You mad at Jake?" Emily asked as she saw the look in Bella's eyes.

"Yes, kinda, maybe, not really, I don't know," she answered, not sure. _Okay, that's a good sign._

I stayed hidden, deciding to listen about what she was really thinking.

"What's up?" Emily asked with concern as she took off her apron.

"It's…. it's embarrassing," she blushed. _Hmmmm…_

"You can tell me," Emily offered a small smile.

"Fine, but you have to promise that you won't laugh," Bella replied.

"I promise"

"He just _won't _touch me. It's really getting onto my nerves. I'm literally serving myself up to him on a silver platter but he just keeps putting the lid back on. Does that make sense?" Bella explained in a frustrated tone.

_Umm, what the hell is she talking about? I can't go a day without a touching her._

"You're saying that you're giving up your body to him but he just keeps pushing you away," Emily translated.

"Exactly. I don't know what his problem is. Am I just not that attractive?" Bella asked self-consciously. _Oh honey, don't say that._

"Trust me Bella. He finds you attractive," Emily chuckled.

"Then what's up? He's acting just like Ed – " Bella cut herself off immediately. _She's honestly comparing me to that fucker?_

"What about _him_?" Emily asked curiously.

"Before, you know, with _him, _whenever 'things' would get heated between us, he always, _always_, pushes me away and says that it's too dangerous. He says that he can't – he won't risk it. It's just so frustrating having to deal with the same thing with Jake. Not only does it remind me of the _past_ butI've never felt so _rejected_ before. It didn't even feel this bad, you know, _back then_," she sighed sadly.

I decided that it was time for me to step in. "Look who we have here," Emily announce, catching my eye.

"Can we talk?" I asked Bella. She still avoided my eyes, making my heart clench.

"You guys _need_ to talk," Emily pressed, walking past me. She threw me a look that obviously said 'Fix this!'

I didn't know what to say, where to start.

"Honey, I – " she held her hand up.

"Not here," she interrupted. She got off of the counter and led me to the woods in Emily and Sam's backyard. Once we got to a pretty good spot, she leaned on a tree with her arms crossed and said, "Talk."

"I do want you. God, so much. I just – I don't," I couldn't finish any of my sentences. She finally raised her eyes up to look at me. I whimpered at what I saw in them. Pain, hurt, _rejection._

"I don't get what the problem is!" she shouted at me. "You say that you want me, but you won't take me. I'm not a fragile doll, Jake. Stop treating me like one. You're acting just like Edward!" she shrieked. Her eyes began to hollow at the mention of his name.

Great, now I'm the one pissed off.

_Fuck. An angry Bella plus an angry Jacob does not make a good combination._

I walked over to her and held her wrists. "Don't compare me to that fucker," I growled. Her eyes widened and she whimpered against me. "I am nothing like him!"

"Then stop acting like it!" she yelled back.

"I don't even think this is about me anymore, is it? You're still thinking about the leech! Am I never going to truly have all of you?" I snapped at her.

"How can you – You can't accuse me of that! I've already given you all that I am Jacob. You're just the one who won't let us step it up!" she spat angrily.

"Me? What about you? You're the one who's telling me to take it slow. Be patient with you. I'm just trying to respect that!" I reminded her painfully.

"Well maybe I don't want you to go slow anymore!" she shot back.

"Then why the hell didn't you say so!"

She burst into sobs and I let go of my grip on her. Slowly, she slid down the tree.

_Oh my god, what did I do?_

"Bella, shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to – " I was cut off by the intensity of her cries.

"I'm so sorry. Dammit Jake, I love you. Just stop pushing me away," she chanted with a tear-stained face.

"Bells," I started, my voice now softer. I hugged her to me. "I love you. You know that. I didn't think you were ready for – hell, I'm not ready for it, not yet at least. I'm just as much as a virgin as you are," I joked, trying to lighten up the situation.

"You are?" she sniffed, finally looking into my eyes.

"Yeah," I gave her a small smile.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" she spat, smacking my chest.

"You never asked," I grinned with a shrug.

Through her angered glare, I knew that she was biting her lip to conceal a smile.

I leaned in and pecked her lips. Her eyes fluttered lovingly at the gesture. I rested our foreheads against each other and left a butterfly kiss on her nose. "I do want _that._ So, so, so much," I assured, kissing her in between each 'so.'

"I want it to be special for you," I added.

"It would be special no matter what Jake. As long as it's with you," she whispered.

"Look, who's getting all cheesy now?" I grinned. She laughed slightly.

"I just wish you'd have told me earlier," she sighed.

"Why is that?"

"So I wouldn't have embarrassed myself with all those innuendos," she muttered, burying her head in my chest. My body vibrated as I laughed.

"I don't. I loved it," I whispered huskily in her ear. She shivered underneath me and I wore a triumphant smile. We stayed in a quiet content, just holding each other.

_That is, until a certain bitch broke the silence._

"Have you fucked her yet?" came Leah's loud yell, from all the way in Sam and Emily's house. Bella looked at me with horrified eyes.

"Damn it Leah!"

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**


	12. I'm With You

**NOTE: Remember when I said the first 15 or so chapters of this story will be fast paced? Yeah, well this is another one of those chapters :) It's six months into Jake and Bella's relationship, so… yup. Enjoy!**

Chapter 12: I'm With You

**Bella POV**

"What's on the agenda today?" I asked Jake with a huge smile.

"Well…." he trailed off with a mischievous smile and then twirled me around, causing me to shriek.

"Jake!" I squealed with a laugh. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on as he twisted. Slowly, he brought me back down on the ground and then left a gentle kiss on my nose.

"I'm going to treat you like a princess today," he grinned.

"You're being overdramatic," I rolled my eyes. He gasped in fake mock, making me laugh.

"I am not! Six month anniversaries are very important, for your information," he stuck his tongue out at me.

"Sure, sure," I chuckled. I looked up and saw him beaming down at me. "What?"

"Nothing," he smiled. I grabbed his hand and intertwined our fingers together.

"Fine, our anniversary will be a go," I finally compromised. If possible, his smile got wider.

"Promise?" he asked.

I nodded and pecked his lips softly. "So, what are we going to do for our _anniversary_?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm not going to tell you," he replied with a glint in his eye, looking at me in disbelief. "Get in the car," he ordered, opening the door of his rabbit.

"Geez Jake, you sound like you're kidnapping me or something," I laughed.

"Yeah, well, maybe I am," he smirked. My eyes widened quickly as I saw two bags full of clothes in the back seats.

"Jake, what the – " he cut me off quickly.

"Nuh uh, I told you I wasn't going to tell you anything," he teased.

"Charlie – "

"Is taken care of," he answered, rolling his eyes. "Do you honestly think I'd ever try to get on your dad's bad side again ever since the _last_ time?" he shook his head. _Right, the last time._

"Okay, good point," I commented.

"You ready?" he asked.

"I guess," I answered playfully with a shrug.

"Oh shut up," he chuckled, "I know you're just excited as I am."

"About what exactly?" I asked.

"You're still trying?" he asked in disbelief. He laughed and shook his head. Turning on the ignition, he stepped on the gas pedal and we were immediately on our way. _Somewhere._

"Sometimes you can be a real ass Jake," I joked, pouting my lips.

"Oh come on Bells, don't do the pout," he whined.

"Sure, sure," I chuckled.

"Humph, you seem to be using that line a lot. Stealer," he teased.

"Hey! It's not my fault that you use it like a gazillion times. It's _your _fault that I'm starting to talk like you," I defended.

"Sure, sure," he said sarcastically.

"You see?" I asked will eyebrows raised. He laughed and proceeded holding my hand.

After a moment of silence, his whole body became tense. He immediately let go of my hand and placed it on the steering wheel, which was being crushed under his vice grip. His nostrils flared and I could literally feel the anger rolling off of him.

"Jake? _Jake_?" I asked worriedly. "Are you alright?" I began to rub his forearm soothingly in hopes of calming him down. It helped some, but his tremors were still bad.

"I love you. You know that, right?" he asked me finally. I looked at him and wondered why he felt the need to announce that.

"And I love you too," I replied automatically. He let out a small, dry laugh.

"It seems that our anniversary will be no go Bells," he stated apologetically before his voice went completely acidic, "We have a _visitor._"

The car came to a stop and Jake already had me out of the car before I can even ask what the hell was going on. From the far distance, I could see the silhouette of someone approaching us.

"Jake, what – " I was cut off short by his loud growl.

"What are you doing here?" he snarled angrily at the figure.

I was confused as to why he was so angry, but when I looked up, I understood.

_No…. it can't be._

Alice.

"I could ask you the same thing, _mutt._ You're on our land, don't you forget that," she hissed back, her eyes narrowing into slits. She'd never looked so much like a vampire to me before this moment. Her eyes were onyx black, flaring with deep anger, and she was crouched down in a position usually perceived as a battle stance.

_I don't understand. Why is she here? Why now? Why not a year ago? Why now when I've finally learned to let go of them? _

"A-Alice?" I managed to choke out, peeking out from behind Jake's back. Jake was also crouched down but in a defensive position, unlike hers.

Her eyes immediately snapped away from Jacob's and onto mine. Her eyes now returned to their original, beautiful golden color as she looked me over, glazing with happiness.

"Bella!" she exclaimed gleefully.

She unconsciously took a step towards me but was shocked back into reality when Jake growled piercingly at her.

"_Don't come near her_," he spat menacingly, fully meaning every word. He meant business.

"You have no right to tell me what to do," she hissed back at him, claiming back her crouched down pose.

"I have every right to protect her from a _bloodsucker_ like you," he countered with a snarl.

"Jake – " I tried to protest, but he gave me a look that told me to shut up. I obliged without complain. I could tell how much he was fighting to not phase and if I talked – or defended her in that matter – he would lose it. I know that he would.

_But I need to talk to her! I have to!_

"You left. _All of you. _What purpose do you have coming back?" Jacob asked, authority clear in his voice.

"I needed to talk to Bella and since she's here, that makes it easier. Now if you'll just move away and let me speak to her – " Jake had cut her off once again.

"No!" he yelled in an ear-splitting snarl. "_You_ don't get to talk to her! Do you understand? You better leave right this instant or else!" he shouted once again.

_I've never seen Jake this angry. Never._

"Who the hell do you think you are to think that you can make decisions for Bella?" she snapped at him. I couldn't help but gasp at what she said. _She's being so hypocritical._

"Oh, that is rich _leech._ That is so _fucking rich!_ You accuse me of doing that, when clearly, it's what all you and you're bloodsucking family have been doing to Bella ever since she first met you!" he sneered.

"We did what we did to protect her!" she defended.

"Protect her? _Protect her?_ That's the last thing your leaving did to her! You killed her. Did you hear me? _You killed her._ If she wanted to stay with you despite the consequences, that would have been _her choice._ But no, you took away her choices and made them for her! So what right do you have to fucking ask me that?" he shouted.

He was now shaking much more terribly that earlier and I was beginning to be afraid for him. I know that he would never be able to forgive himself if he knew that he couldn't control himself around me. I took a daring step forward and wrapped my arms around him, to try to calm him down.

"What are you doing?" Alice shrieked at me. "That dog is _volatile_ Bella! He could hurt you at any moment, right now!"

That was when he completely stopped shaking. Though he was not relaxed, he was calm enough to stand still in my arms, slightly melting into my embrace.

"I would _never_ hurt her," he vowed, "Not in the way you did or in any other way."

For the first time since she came back, guilt, pain, and sadness finally took their places in her eyes. I couldn't take it any longer. I couldn't take having two of the most important people in my life yelling, shouting, and accusing each other right in front of my face. I decided to do what I had to do, contrary to what I know will occur between me and Jake later on.

"Alice," I pleaded, "Please, just go."

"I need to talk to you Bella. I have to," she implored back.

"Fine, we'll talk," I sighed in agreement.

Jake's eyes flashed to meet mine in disbelief. "You can't be serious – "

"Go Alice. Now. Meet me in my bedroom at eight," I informed her. She nodded and skidded off back into the forest. I closed my eyes and turned back to see Jake flaring with anger, not only towards Alice, but now also towards me.

"_What the fuck was that?_ You're just…. you're letting her back into your life, just like that? You're being fucking ridiculous!" he spat at me. I flinched at the intensity of his voice, but knew that I deserved it.

"I need answers Jacob. I have so many questions unasked. I think that it's about time I get the answers to them, it's the least Alice owes me. I'm not running back to them. I will never be with them ever again, okay?" I assured him. His face was impassive, and he obviously had not believed a single word I'd said.

"I don't believe you," he stated bluntly, his arms crossed across his chest. His eyes were glaring at me fiercely.

I silently fumed with anger until I could no longer take his accusing glare. I let out a frustrated cry and flailed my arms into the air. "Fine, don't believe me!" I shouted at him irritably. "I believed you when you promised me that you won't imprint, but you won't believe me about this! You are being so unfair!" I continued in aggravation.

I started to walk away from him when I decided to just walk back home since I couldn't really stand his presence at the moment. Before I could even make it within ten feet, he already had me crushed back against his chest.

"I'm so sorry," he breathed onto my hair, clutching onto my body dependently. "I just – I'm _so scared,_ Bella. I don't want to lose you," he admitted, small sobs escaping his lips.

I finally melted against his body and began stroking the back of his neck. His face was buried in the crook of my neck, breathing in my scent. "Shh," I whispered soothingly in his ear. His vice-like grip on my hips tightened even further, refusing to let me go. "_I love you. You know that, right_?" I asked him, repeating the question he once earlier asked me.

I felt his nod against my skin and sighed. "I'm not going to leave. I'm just going to talk to her to get some answers. If it makes you feel better and secure, you can patrol around the house and keep a look-out for me. _I'm not going to leave_," I assured him once again, pulling back from his embrace so that I could cup his cheeks.

"Okay," he finally whispered in agreement.

I could see the conflict in his eyes.

"I'm not going to leave," I repeated as I wiped the few tears that escaped his eyes.

"You're not going to leave," he murmured back to himself.

"Because I love you, I choose you, and I'm going to have my forever with you," I added, meaning each and every word.

"I love you too Bells. _So much_," he whispered.

"I know Jake, and that's why you've got to trust me," I said.

"I do trust you," he replied.

"Then let me go, okay? I need to talk to her," I continued.

"I'll be watching for you," he informed me.

I leaned in and landed a slow, sensual, and meaningful kiss on his lips. "I'm with you Jake. _Always_. Don't ever forget that."

**As you can see, this is pretty much where all the fun starts. Who can't wait for the next chapter? xD**

**Here's a sneak peak to all of my loyal readers (P.S. They're just random snippets):**

_"Of course I'm not happy to see you! What do you expect from me? You guys just suddenly dropped from the face of the earth and now you've got the guts to show up. This is ridiculous!"_

_"I still love you Bella. We all love you."_

_"They've been here this entire time! How can they do this to me?"_

_"Help me forget about everything. Alice, the Cullens, Edward, imprinting, everything. Just help me forget. Please."_

**There you guys have it! I hope that you're all still there. **

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	13. Facing the Past

Chapter 13: Facing the Past

**Bella POV**

"Are you alright?" I asked Jake, grabbing onto his shaking hands. He closed his eyes and took deep breaths.

"I can't believe that I'm letting you go through with this," he muttered to himself.

"You have to," I pleaded with him. He let out a frustrated groan.

"I know, I know! But it doesn't mean that I have to like it," he said as he clenched the steering wheel in a tight grip. I finally unlocked my seatbelt and scooted over next to him. I linked my arm through his and pushed my body to his.

Resting my chin on his shoulder, I murmured, "It'll be okay. I promise. If for some reason, she decides to kidnap me or anything – which I highly doubt – I'll scream the first chance I get." His tremors still wouldn't stop, so I decided to place a soft but sensual kiss on his shoulder. "I love you," I whispered.

He sighed heavily, but his shaking finally stopped. He turned towards me and crushed his lips to mine. "I love you too," he murmured against my lips.

"You okay now?" I asked, continuously pecking his lips.

"I am now," he said. I could feel his smile against my lips.

"Down boy," I joked. He rolled his eyes.

"I'll be very near," he promised me as he kissed me one more time. I nodded and watched as he ran into the woods. I looked at the dashboard and saw that the time was already 7:55. Knowing Alice, I knew that she'd be precise with her timing. She'll be in my room at 8 o'clock sharp.

I got out of my truck and walked inside the house. I heard Jake's howl and knew that he was already watching me from the woods. "I'll be fine!" I shouted. He barked, letting me know that he heard me.

I walked up to my room and just sat down on my bed. I still don't know how I feel about Alice being here. Am I angry? Furious? Happy? I was thinking so hard that I didn't realize that Alice had already come into my room.

"Bella!" she exclaimed and then took me into her arms. I kept my arms at my sides because I still didn't know how I should feel about her being here. "Bella?" she asked in confusion.

"Yes Alice?" I responded in an unsure tone.

"Are you not happy to see me?"

Finally, I knew exactly how to feel.

"You're kidding me, right?" I spat at her. "Of course I'm not happy to see you! What do you expect from me? You guys just suddenly dropped from the face of the earth and now you've got the guts to show up. This is ridiculous!" I shouted.

"Bella, I – " I cut her off immediately.

"Don't you dare tell me that you're sorry!" I shrieked, "Because it's not going to change anything! You left. I moved on. That's all there is to it. There's no reason for you, _your_ family, or Edward to be here!"

"You can't possibly mean that," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. I narrowed my eyes at her, challenging her statement. "You have to understand Bella! We did what we did for your safety," she pleaded.

"No," I said firmly. "What I understand is that you did what you did because you didn't give me a choice in the matter! If given the choice, I would have never permitted you to leave, but no. I wasn't given that choice, was I? So now, you have to deal with the consequences of your actions," I told her.

She let out a groan of frustration before dropping on the rocking chair that Edward had used so many times before. Strangely, I didn't feel a pang of hurt.

"I didn't want to leave you. I was against it, believe me, I was. I told Edward what would happen if we left you, but you know how he is," she informed, letting out a small chuckle, "He's too stubborn. He forced us all to leave."

"Just how hard did you fight against him?" I asked her sarcastically.

"I went as far as to beating him up to a pulp," she told me, her eyes lighting up at my amused expression.

"Was Jasper okay?"

"Not at first," she answered with a sigh, "He was beating himself up for what he did. He kept saying that it was his fault that you got hurt, which is the reason why we left in the first place."

"I never blamed him for – " I started to say, but she cut me off.

"I know that," she smiled at me, "I told him that and he nearly believed me until – "

"Until what Alice?" I asked impatiently. Her eyes began to darken once again.

"Edward blamed him," she spat, "There hasn't been a day that has passed that Edward doesn't remind Jasper that it's all his fault that he had to leave his _precious_ Bella. That was the main reason why I beat him up, because it wasn't Jasper's fault at all. Partly, maybe, but it wasn't completely his fault. If Edward just wasn't so damn stubborn and looked at things a little more differently then there wouldn't have been a reason to leave."

"I can't believe he would do that," I said through gritted teeth, clenching my fists in anger. I closed my eyes and tried to calm down some. _You can't let Alice off the hook. Remember, she left you too._ "You've answered all that I needed to know. You can go now," I added firmly. Her eyes widened.

"Bella, please!" she begged, dropping to her knees. I couldn't stop the tears that threatened to spill down my cheeks. I looked away from her.

"Please, go," I repeated. She looked into my eyes and realized that I wasn't going to change my mind. For the first time in my life, I saw Alice cry… tears of blood. I couldn't help the worry that rose in me. She quickly wiped them away and then took out a piece of paper.

"Just… call me or visit me if you change your mind," she implored, handing me a piece of paper with her number on it.

"I'm never going to call – " I started to say, but she interrupted me.

"Just keep an open mind. That is all I ask. Don't call me, don't visit me, that's alright. I'll be out of your life. I promise," she said. I sighed and took the paper in my hands.

"Okay," I whispered softly.

"I still love you Bella. We all love you," she reminded me as she began to walk away.

"I wish I could still say the same," I murmured while she disappeared from my sight. I collapsed onto the bed and held the piece of paper in my hands tightly as if it was going to disappear if I don't hold onto it hard enough. I struggled to read what was on the paper because I just couldn't believe it.

_16537 Andromeda St.  
Seattle, WA  
(816) 741-9385_

They'd been living in Washington this whole time! I can't… I can't believe this! How could have they been right under my nose and I never once heard of them or seen them from all the times that I've visited Seattle? I couldn't help the erratic gasps that came from my mouth. I was so disturbed by the piece of information that I've just learned that I didn't notice Jake barging into my room.

"Bella?" he asked frantically in worry. "Are you alright?"

"They've been here all along," I chanted.

"Bella? Honey, you're scaring me. Tell me what's going on!" he demanded. I couldn't utter a word. He saw the offending piece of paper in my hands and immediately grabbed it. "What does this mean?"

"They've been here this entire time! How can they do this to me? All this time I thought that they could be halfway around the world in Europe or damn Asia but all this time they've been in the same state! I can't believe this!" I started to shout at no one specifically.

Jake restrained me by wrapping his arms around me. "Calm down, please," he begged. I could feel his warm breath tickling my neck and was able to calm down a little bit. The tears finally escaped.

"They're so selfish," I sobbed. His eyes showed understanding and he held me closer to him the more I cried. I grabbed onto his shirt and begged, "Don't leave me too."

"Shh, I'm here. I won't ever leave you," he promised, stroking my hair gently. I audibly heard him take a gulp. "You're not… you're not considering on going back to them… are you?" he asked in a hushed tone, afraid to hear the answer.

I took one final sniff before turning around to face him. I cupped his cheeks and rested our forehead against each other. "No, never again," I vowed, letting my breath fan across his face. "I just… I thought that I was done crying for them but then… she came back! For what? I finally have the pieces of my life pieced back together and here she comes ruining it again. It's not fair!"

"It's alright," he soothed. He placed a hand at the small of my back and then laid me down on the bed. I automatically curled my body against him and buried my head on his bare chest. "Forget about it for a second and just relax," he suggested. I nodded weakly and began to close my eyes. His hands began to caress the small piece of skin that had been exposed due to my shirt riding up.

"Okay," I murmured lowly. "Will you stay with me for the night?" I asked. I looked up and he gave me a nod. "You won't leave me?"

"I'm not going to leave you. I promise," he said, placing a gentle kiss on my forehead.

"Even if you imprint?" I asked, not being able to help myself. His body tensed.

"Do you always have to bring _that_ up?" he replied with a bit of an edge in his voice. I flinched, hearing that kind of tone come from him.

"It's stupid. I know. I'm sorry," I apologized quickly, bringing my head down in shame. He sighed and placed a finger on my chin, tilting it up. Slowly, he leaned down and placed an urgent kiss on my lips.

"I'm sorry too," he said.

I have no idea what came over me. Maybe it was the fact that even though Jake was the one here by my side, my mind was still occupied by Alice and her possible reasons for showing up to me. Or maybe it was the fact that at any time Jake could be taken away from me with a blink of an eye. But whatever reason it was, I wrapped my arms around Jake's neck and rolled to straddle him.

"What are you – " I cut him off by placing a finger on his lips.

"Help me forget about everything," I whispered in his ear. "Alice, the Cullens, _Edward,_ imprinting, everything. Just help me forget. Please," I pleaded.

He looked up as he searched my eyes. Without hesitance, his hands began to slide up my thighs, testing the waters. I shivered in delight, feeling his warm, calloused hands explore me.

"Charlie?" he asked huskily.

"Is working overnight," I answered quickly.

Almost immediately, he flipped us over so that he was the one hovering over me. He leaned down and began placing soft, sensual kisses on my bare neck. "Are you sure?" he murmured.

"Absolutely," I managed to say in a choked breath. He lips drew higher until he reached my earlobe.

"There's no going back after this," he warned me, "You'll be mine forever."

Nothing else seemed better to me at the moment.

"Then make me yours," I said firmly, locking our eyes together.

He crashed his lips onto mine and sealed the deal through a long lasting night of pleasure.

**Sorry for not updating for nearly two weeks! I was over at a cousin's house and I didn't have my laptop with me. Sorry!**

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	14. Not Now

Chapter 14: Not Now

**Jacob POV**

I woke up the next morning feeling the best I've ever had in my life. As soon as I opened my eyes, I was met with the loving eyes of none other than Bella. "Morning," she smiled. I realized that I still had my arm wrapped tightly around her naked body so I took the chance to tighten my grip.

"Good morning good looking," I grinned. She rolled her eyes but stretched up to place a kiss on my lips. "Best night ever," I smirked.

"Shut up," she muttered, not being able to help the blush that crept up her cheeks. I rolled over to hover over her and then began placing open-mouthed kissed on her neck. I could her heart beating faster and faster.

"That's not what you were saying last night," I said, my voice husky from sleep. I felt her shiver under me. Her eyes widened and her cheeks grew redder. I leaned into her ear and whispered, "In fact, from what I recall, you were screaming my name."

"Jacob!" she shrieked.

"Hmm… not like that. It was a bit more sexual, more needy, full of lus – " she smacked me on the chest.

"Stop speaking so dirty!" she screamed in horror. _She's so cute. _I feigned innocence with a small smirk on my face.

"Why? You liked it so much before that you were begging me to speak like this," I pointed out. She groaned and covered her face with her hands. "Come on Bells. I'm just teasing," I joked. _Only a little bit._

"I'm not like _that_," she told me, finally putting down her hands.

"I know honey but you can't blame a guy for trying," I shrugged, grinning at her.

She bit her lip and then looked up at me through her lashes. I suppressed a groan that was threatening to erupt from my lips. "Do you… do you want me to speak like that?" she asked shyly.

"It'd be fucking awesome if you did," I smiled sheepishly but then quickly added, "But you don't ever have to change for me, got it? I love you the way you are."

"Thanks Jake," she beamed up at me, "I love you too."

"You better," I joked, playfully poking her ribs.

"Hey!" she protested, poking me back. I couldn't help but jerk back at the unexpected jab. It also doesn't help that it's my… ahem… ticklish spot. "Is that your…" she trailed off with an evil smirk on her face.

"Don't even think about – " I was cut off my own shriek. _No, it did not sound like a girl's scream_. More like a… choking cat. Within seconds she had us flipped over and she was mercilessly attacking my ticklish spot. I was grasping for air by the time she was halfway into it. "You are so going to get it," I warned her.

"Stop it Jake! That tickles!" she screamed with laughter as she tried to get me off of her.

"You didn't give me mercy when you were doing it to me," I reminded her with a chuckle, still poking her known ticklish spots.

"Please," she gasped.

"What was that? I can't hear you," I teased, laughing.

"I give, I give! I'm sorry!" she yelled as I took one hard jab at her most ticklish spot.

"Alright," I smirked, finally letting go of her. I rolled over and landed right next to her. She was breathing so hard that it almost sounded like we had just finished having sex. I grinned at the thought.

"You are… despicable!" she cursed, flailing her arms out in mock horror.

"Hmm, despicable me," I grinned at her, obviously making a reference to one of THE best movies ever. She caught onto it and began laughing.

"This," she gestured between me and her, "is why I love you so much." I was about to respond to her declaration until I heard the unmistakable sound of Charlie's cruiser parking in the driveway.

"Shit, you're dad's here," I told her. Her eyes bugged out and she immediately pushed me off of the bed, making me land on the floor with a loud 'thud.'

"Ouch," I exaggerated. She wrapped the sheet around her body, completely blocking it from my view.

"You need to leave," she said, beginning to push me out of the window.

"Bells, even if I leave, there's no way that Charlie's gonna look at you and think that nothing went on last night," I pointed out, gesturing to her 'sex' hair. She scrambled to her vanity mirror and gasped.

"I have – "

"Sex hair, honey, and it looks great on you," I grinned.

"This is no laughing matter!" she whisper yelled at me. "Charlie's gonna be here any momen – "

"Bells? You there?" came Charlie's gruff voice.

"Crap, crap, crap," she chanted as she tried to think of some sort of solution. "I got it! I'm gonna go take a shower and you go leave," she finally said, pushing me out.

I sighed in defeat. "Alright, see you later?" I asked.

"Definitely," she smiled. I quickly left a chaste kiss on her lips and jumped out of the window, immediately phasing. I ran as fast as I could to the woods, making sure that no one saw me. I stayed at the edge of the woods for a while as I watched Bella scramble in her room.

"I'm here Dad!" she told Charlie right afterwards, "I'm just getting into the shower."

"Alright kiddo," he responded. She let out a sigh of relief until her eyes landed on something, or rather, _things._

_Great, what now?_

"How am I going to pick up all of these clothes?" she muttered frustratingly to herself. I couldn't help the bark of laughter that came from my muzzle. As if she heard me, her head snapped out towards the window and looked right at me, her eyes narrowing into slits. "We are never having sex in this house ever again," she said directly to me under her breath.

_Never? Aww, fuck._

As far as I could tell, she just pretty much kicked everything under her bed before running into the bathroom. _God, I love that girl._

I finally backed up and began running towards my house. I felt a spark in my head and soon enough Paul and Embry were in my head.

_Someone's in a good mood_. Paul teased.

_Whoo! Jakey finally got laid!_ Embry wolf whistled.

_Shut up, you guys._ I growled at them.

_No more sexual tension. Thank God!_ Paul said in relief.

_Mind showing us some scenes?_ Embry asked. I could just totally imagine him wiggling his eyebrows.

_Yes, I do fucking mind. Her body is strictly for my eyes only._ I barked at him.

_Oh come on!_ Paul whined. The look I gave him was enough for him to shut up. _Is she at least good?_

_She's damn amazing_. I replied.

_Hmm, seems like we have a sex kitten in our hands._ Embry joked, letting out barks of laughter. He thought about something for a minute before laughing harder. _Sex kitten, big bad wolf, oh how ironic is that!_

Surely enough, Paul started laughing at the thought too. I growled at them but they didn't pay any attention. _I'm going back home. You guys are assholes._

_Sheesh, Jake. Take it easy, we were only – _I had already phased back and stopped listening to their pathetic excuses. I ran as quickly as I could into the shower, seeing as I was stark naked. I'm sure that my dad must have felt the gust of wind that was me.

I took a quick shower because I couldn't wait to get back to Bella already. I put on my clothes and started for the door but my dad stopped me.

"Jake," he called out.

"Yeah, dad?" I asked. He was looking at me with scrutinizing eyes, yet they had a bit of amusement and pride in them.

"Where were you last night?" he asked. I sighed and took a seat. _Great._

"One of the leeches came back last night," with that statement, his eyes widened. I answered his unasked question. "It was the short, pixie-looking one. She talked about Bella disappearing from her visions or something like that and wanted to check up on Bella. Long story short, I was pissed off and damn near ripped her head off. I let Bella talk to her and she's gone, but I don't know for how long. Bella says as long as she doesn't want the leech here, she won't come back. Bella… kind of broke down by the time the leech left. She asked me to stay with her, so I did," I explained.

By the time I finished, he had a thoughtful look on his face.

"And what did you guys do?" he asked.

"What?" I asked in confusion.

"Did you guys sleep? Watch TV?" _I really don't like where this is going._

"We slept," I said nervously as I rubbed the back of my head, "… eventually."

He burst out into laughter, cradling his stomach for support. I just stood there with my arms crossed impatiently waiting for him to finish. He wiped a few laughter tears from his eyes before he finally calming down.

"You finally got laid," he stated matter-of-factly, snickering.

"Ha. Ha. Funny, Dad," I muttered.

"I wonder how Charlie is going to take this. He, obviously, won't be laughing at your face like I did," he smirked at me. _You're gonna get it, old man._

"We, maybe, had a close call," I added in snidely.

"She kicked you out?" he asked.

"Oh yeah," I answered, grinning at the recent memory.

"And you were just about to go out to see her again, am I right?" I nodded. "Alright, I won't keep you any longer. Go and see your _honey_," he teased, mocking me. I narrowed my eyes at him before leaving the house. He can be more immature than me sometimes.

I decided to take the rabbit this time, seeing as Charlie might still be at home. I drove as quickly as I could to Bella's house. As I parked upon their sidewalk, Bella was already out to greet me. _Hmm, she must have heard the car._

"Jake!" she exclaimed happily, tossing herself into my arms once I got out of the car.

"Missed me?" I asked cockily.

"Did I ever!" she replied as she played along. I leaned down and kissed her lips.

"Missed you too," I murmured against her lips.

"Kids," Charlie then coughed from the doorway.

"Dad," Bella squeaked.

Charlie crossed his arms and looked at us uncomfortably. "As much as I like the fact that you guys are together, I don't want to see any of… this," he stated bluntly, gesturing to both Bella and I.

"Right," Bella said, flushing, "Well, we'll be going now."

"Well then, umm… bring her home in one piece," he warned me.

"I'll do my best," I grinned at him. He tried to keep a serious face on but I notice the corner of his lips twitch up a bit. Bella, embarrassed enough, grasped my wrist and dragged me to the rabbit.

"Never again," she hissed under her breath.

"Oh come on, really?" I looked at her pleadingly as I began to drive.

"Eyes on the road," she growled. _Oooh, sexy._ "I'm serious Jake! Do you have any idea how close we were to getting caught?" she shrieked.

I smirked. "_But_ we didn't," I pointed out.

"But we almost did!"

"Again, _but_ we didn't," I grinned.

"You're impossible," she muttered, smacking her forehead in annoyance.

"Seriously Bells, I'm a guy. The thought of having sex with the Chief's daughter under his own home is like totally kinky and – " she cut me off with a loud smack to the shoulder.

"Ahh, _fuck_!" she cursed, cradling her hand. _Oh shit._ I pulled over as quickly as I could and struggled to get a good look at her hand. "Don't touch it!" she yelled.

"I'm just trying to see if it's broken," I said gently, trying not to push her anger.

"I think it is!" she snapped. I tried to stifle my laughter.

"_Well_, if you hadn't decided to punch me in the first place," I chuckled. She glared at me through narrowed eyes. "Baby, that hurt you more than it hurt me."

She stopped wincing in pain for a moment to look at me with a bewildered yet amused expression. "_Baby?_" she mocked. _Fuck, that slipped. I'm only supposed to call her that in my fantasies._

"You're worrying about your hand, remember?" I quickly said, trying to change the subject by lifting her hand up.

"Oww! Damn it Jake!" she shouted at me. I winced.

"Right, right. I'm so sorry!" I apologized, leaning over to place as many kisses on her hand as possible.

"Well if you're kissing my hand like that," she grinned as her eyes contained a mischievous glint in them.

Just as we were about to delve into a _deep_ make out session, we just had to be _fucking _interrupted.

"What have you done to her?" an voice growled from my side of the car.

_Oh fuck no._ _He can't have come back._

_Not now_.

**Uh oh! **

**Wonder what's gonna happen now...**

**Don't forget to REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	15. One Day

**Sorry for not updating! UGH! I'm totally failing at life right now D:**

**Anyways, I decided to update today, considering its my... BIRTHDAY!**

**HELL YEAH! I'm finally 15 :)**

**Hope you guys like this chapter!  
**

Chapter 15: One Day

**Bella POV**

_No_.

_It just can't be __him__._

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Jake growled as he stepped out of the car, nearly ripping the door out of its hinges, "You're supposed to be gone. Somewhere, anywhere, that's not near _her!"_

"How can you be shouting at me when you're the one who's terribly hurt Bella?" Edward snapped back as he gestured to my injured hand.

"You are the biggest hypocrite in the universe!" Jacob yelled at him, his shaking worse than ever. I stumbled to get out of the car and next to Jake.

"Bella, love, get away from him!" Edward warned, taking a step to grab for me but Jake blocked him.

"Not _fucking_ likely," he hissed as he fell into a defensive crouch.

"Don't you forget that you're in _my_ territory," Edward reminded him.

"And don't you forget that I have every right to attack if you attack me first," Jake snarled.

I gasped as I saw Edward's eyes darken with such a wild ferocity that he looked more like a vampire to me than ever before. I couldn't help the way my body whimpered at the thought. Edward… was actually dangerous. Jake somehow caught my change in composition and immediately stopped shaking enough to take a look at me.

"Bells?" he asked imploringly. His eyes gave everything away. He's _scared_.

"I'm – I'm fine," I managed to choke out.

"Love," Edward tried to take another step towards me.

"Don't," both Jake and I said angrily. Jake and I spared a glance at each other. He gave me the okay to handle the situation myself.

"Just stay where you are," I said, taking a deep gulp. I held my good hand up as if trying to push him away. "What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I saw you in Alice's mind. I just had to see you. No, I _needed_ too," he explained with a pleading voice.

"After a _year_?" I asked in disbelief. "Do you think that it was okay for you to just disappear and nearly make me go crazy with the thought that maybe you never really existed, that I just imagined the whole thing? It's not okay! So you have no right to just come back her unannounced!" I shouted.

Jake made a motion to move but I grabbed his wrist tightly and forced him beside me. I looked up at him and he gave me a nod of understanding. _I need you to be here._

"I know that I had no right but I – " I cut him off.

"Don't give me the 'protecting me' bullshit. Alice already tried that and clearly that didn't turn out so well," I reminded him, knowing that he knows that I have not accepted Alice back into my life.

"Can't we just talk?" he asked. "Privately," he added, giving Jake an annoyed look.

"We _are_ talking. Besides, how do I know that you're not going to kidnap me?" I snapped at him.

"You really… think I would do that?" Edward asked, hurt clearly laced in his voice.

"I don't know. You tell me. You lost my trust the minute you left me in that forest," I said harshly.

"Bella," he sighed sadly. For a moment, I lost my grip on Jake's wrist and I finally took the time to look at Edward in the eye. I couldn't take the emotion that he held in them. He did _truly_ love me. The emotions in his eyes prove that much. _Who am I kidding? This is Edward we're talking about._

"Look, I'm sorry," I apologized.

Jacob quickly spun to me. "You're sorry?" he asked with a disbelieving look.

"Yeah, you're sorry? What could you possibly be sorry for?" Edward asked in confusion, his face contorted into an even pained expression.

"For being so cold to you," I answered.

"But I deserve it," he argued.

"He does deserve it," Jake hissed at me.

"Jake – " I tried to say but he cut me off.

"I can't believe this," he growled at me. He growled. _At me._ I gasped in surprise and jumped back. He painfully ripped his hand from me and began to back off.

"Where are you going?" I whispered.

"You're clearly getting back with _him_ so I'm going to make it easy for myself and just leave you before you could leave me," he said, running off into the forest. My eyes widened and I couldn't help the tears that began sliding down my cheeks.

"Jake!" I shouted, beginning to run after him.

"Bella, it's okay," Edward breathed out, flushing me against his body.

"But I love him, Edward! I'm not choosing you!" I flailed against his grasp.

"Shh," he hushed, brushing my hair, "I know. I can tell that you do love him. I realize now that my actions are what caused this and it's no one else's fault but mine. I'm sorry for burdening you with my presence. I just really needed to see you."

"You aren't here to try to persuade me back?" I asked, trying to stifle my sobs.

"I knew what I was getting into before I came after you. Alice warned me well," he explained, giving me a soft smile.

"Then why were you being so hostile against Jake?" He chuckled a bit and finally pulled away from our embrace.

"You were hurt. I'm sorry that my instincts took the best of me. One look at him gave off the warning bell," he offered.

"Then what are you here for?" I asked curiously.

"To ask for forgiveness. You deserve to be happy with whomever you choose to be with. I owe you enough to give you that. I just… I can't continue living in this world knowing that you hate me," he said sadly.

"Edward," I murmured, "I don't hate you. I don't think I could ever hate you. Yes, I'm angry at you, but no, I don't hate you." I said this to him with a gentle smile.

"Really?"

"Yes, really. And I've forgiven you," I added. He grinned and pulled me into another hug.

"You really are the most selfless and unforgiving creature I've ever met!" he exclaimed.

"Creature? Did you just call me a creature?" I teased with a raised eyebrow. He smiled sheepishly. "_Wow_, you _are_ a hypocrite," I joked.

"Thank you for everything Bella," he smiled at me.

"Do you mind spending the rest of the day with me?" I asked kindly. His eyes widened and he began shaking his head furiously.

"No, no. I possibly can't. What about Jacob? You must make amends with him!" he exclaimed. I sighed and shrugged at him. _He left me, growled at me. One day won't hurt._

"Give him time to cool off. I'm sure he'd rip my head off if I show up to him now," I replied. Edward growled at the mention of my head being ripped off. "Relax, it's just a figure of speech," I added, trying to calm him down.

"Right, sorry. Old habits die hard," he chuckled, finally relaxing.

"So where do you want to hang out?"

"Anywhere you would like," he suggested but then his eyes flickered to my hand, "but maybe he should get you patched up first." At the mention of my hand, I winced realizing my forgotten injury. He turned his back towards me and then kneeled on the ground.

"What are you doing?" I asked in confusion.

He patted his back and grinned at me. "Hop on. Just like the old times," he said. I smiled and got onto his back. Almost immediately, I shut my eyes closed and felt a huge gust of air run past me. "We're here," he announced.

"Wow," I said lazily as I fell of his back, "That was fast."

"That's what she said," he commented, laughing out loud.

"Edward Mason Cullen," I scolded, placing my good hand on my hip, "What happened to your innocent, old mind?" He grinned at the expression on my face and soon enough I joined his laughter.

"It's better if you don't know," he then added seriously. His façade fell off and he laughed even harder. I smiled at our first real interaction. _Ever._ Even back when we were together, our presence with each other was never this easy.

I got my hand bandaged and the doctor said that it should be healed in a week. Afterwards, Edward and I proceeded to a coffee shop even though he couldn't really eat or drink anything. I had my hot, mocha cappuccino wrapped around my fingers while I was sipping off of it. I've been quietly listening to some of Edward's journeys.

"So, no girl?" I asked with an eyebrow raised. His eyes flashed with sadness for a moment but he quickly covered it up.

"Even if there was, I wouldn't be able to get too attached especially if the woman that I want is way out of my reach," he explained gloomily. I sighed and placed my cappuccino on the table and grabbed his hand. His eyes flashed to mine with confusion.

"Look Edward, one day you'll find the right girl for you, but it's just not me. There's a reason for everything and I believe that there's a reason that fate decided for us to not be together. I _know_ that Jake is it for me. I can feel it with every fiber of my being. I also know that there's someone for you. Luckily for you, you have an eternity to find her," I smiled at him. He returned it.

"So let's stop living in the past, okay? I know that you'll always love me and I'll always love you. First loves are not something we can easily forget, right?" He nodded. "After today, I know that we'll see each other again and I hope that you've had found _her_ by that time. Then we'll share stories about her and I'll tell you about my life. Our friendship doesn't stop here," I continued.

"Thank Bella. Really," he smiled, gently squeezing my hand.

"And… can you tell Alice that I'm sorry for the way I acted to her arrival? It just came to as such a shock and I was still angry at the time. Tell her that I want to see her before the two of you leave again," I asked of him.

"Of course. She's been nothing but sad and angry at the world since we left. I'm sure it would mean a lot to her," he replied. "Well, I better get going. I won't take up any more of your time," he added. He stood up and towered over me. I grabbed my coffee and moved to stand up too.

"Goodbye, Edward Cullen. I'm looking forward to seeing you again soon," I smiled, wrapping my arms around him for a hug. He returned the hug tenderly and then placed a kiss on my forehead.

"I'm happy that you're happy Bella. That is all that matters to me. I can't wait for our paths to cross again," he said sincerely before blending in with the air.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. I need to talk to Jake. Immediately.

Seeing as though I had no ride, I braced myself for a long journey towards the Blacks' house. I cupped the hot cappuccino between my hands and began walking. It was a good thing that their house was near the main road, which was always lit up with streetlights. It took me about twenty minutes to get to the treaty line. That meant I still have about another twenty minutes before I could arrive.

Once I stepped over the treaty line, three blurs streaked passed me and then stood before me. The three wolves, black, silver, and brown, crouched at me. I wasn't scared. I knew that it was the Pack, but what I don't understand is why they're growling at me like that. The brown one walked over to me slowly and began sniffing me.

Quickly, he ran back to the other two and it seemed like they were having a mental conversation. The brown wolf ran back into the trees and came out as Jared. His eyes were a bit enraged. _Surely, they've heard about what happened._

"What are you doing here?" he snapped at me. I tried to keep my voice as strong as I could.

"I came here to see Jake," I replied defiantly, crossing my arms in a challenge.

"Don't you think you've done enough?" a different voice hissed. My head snapped to look at the offender. It was none other than Paul.

"No, I really don't think I have done enough," I spat. Both of them growled at me as well. "It's clear to anyone's eyes that they haven't done enough when the one they clearly love doesn't trust them. Jake just assumed, okay? 'Oh hey, Edward's here. She doesn't need me anymore. She never really loved me.' He didn't even allow me to say anything. He just ran away," I added.

Their eyes gave away nothing and were still looking at me blankly. I sighed and just pushed on through and continued walking.

"Where do you think you're going?" Paul growled.

I turned around and glared at him.

"Where do you think?" I asked rhetorically.

The black wolf, whom I now assume as Sam, gave them a quick nod and soon afterwards both Jared and Paul backed off. I tried to give Sam a thankful expression but he just dismissed me. _Fuckers._

They didn't even offer to run me to Jake's house. _Oh no_, they left me alone on the freaking side of the road, expecting me to make another twenty minute walk. Jacob better not bitch at me by the time I get there or I just might be the one to rip his head off.

**I told you guys that I will not be bashing the Cullens in this story, didn't I? Well, I won't be. This chapter is proof of that :DD**

**ALSO, I'm hoping to update Another Chance tonight as well... so LOOK OUT for that too!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!  
**


	16. Where Are You?

**Okay, guys, so there's a perfect explanation of why I just suddenly disappeared from the face of the earth :/**

**I no longer own my own computer. My parents sold it to buy a Mac. I already know what you're thinking. "Oh, that's great!"  
No, it's not -.-**

**They put the Mac out in the living room so if I ever want to use the computer I have to use it THERE. I hate it because they monitor every single freaking thing that I do.**

**No, they do not know that I write stories. They would flip if they found out that I use SWEAR WORDS. So, there's no possible way that I could write anything while they're looking over my shoulder or checking what I'm doing. It's such a PAIN. I wanna get back to writing SO MUCH. The only times I ever get to write anything is when they go to places and even then, I don't get enough time.**

**I'm really trying to write as much as I can, though. I PROMISE.**

**I'll try to update from now on, even if it's just once every two weeks.**

**I really hope you guys can forgive me. I hope you guys are still there. Thanks to all those who haven't given up on me!**

**I LOVE YOU GUYS!**

**NOTE: I know Bella doesn't have a windowsill, but I thought it'd be cool for her to have one for this chapter. So… yup! Go on! READ and ENJOY :D**

Chapter 16: Where Are You?

**Bella POV**

Dammit. My legs hurt like hell.

By the time I made it to their place, I collapsed onto the driveway and began to massage the soles of my feet. I decided that running would get me there faster. _What a stupid idea that was._

"Fucking Jacob," I muttered to myself, wincing not only at the pain in my foot but at the pain in my broken hand. I had subconsciously used it to massage my feet.

"Whoa there, are you alright?" I heard the unmistakable voice of Leah asked as she jogged over to me. I looked at her, relieved that she didn't have the same hostile attitude towards me.

"And you're not hating on me because…?" She gave me a confused expression.

"Why would I be hating on you?" she asked. I explained to her about everything's that happened to me today. "Wow, those assholes," she muttered.

"I know right!" I exclaimed. "Now, not only do I have an angry wolf man and a broken hand, I also have sore legs and feet. I'm about ready to rip Jake a new one," I hissed.

"Which would be kind of hard, considering Jake isn't here right now," she said slowly, trying not to test my patience.

"He's what now? So you're telling me that I just put myself through that torture for nothing! Fuck it!" I shouted into the sky before falling back onto the ground.

"You're being a little dramatic, don't you think?" she asked, chuckling.

"No, I think Jake was being _too_ dramatic. I mean, come on, this isn't some cheesy scripted movie where the girl goes back to her vampire ex-boyfriend. He just couldn't trust me, could he?" I spat at myself more than anything.

"Okay, I'll admit, his reaction was a bit harsh but can you blame the guy? He's been fighting for your affections way before Cullen ever had but the leech still got you first. Besides, do you not remember how Jake was the one who patched you up from the devastation of _Cullen's departure_?" she asked. I sniffed, nodding at her question. _Okay, I guess she has a point._

"Where is he anyways?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Running to let out some steam," she answered. "I doubt he'll be home for a while, do you want me to run you back home?" she offered. I gave her a relieved sigh.

"You're a life saver Leah. I'm so glad that we're friends and not enemies," I smiled at her. She held out a hand to me which I quickly grabbed.

"Me too," she replied before settling me on her back. We arrived at my place in a few minutes and she placed me down on my doorstep carefully.

"Thanks Leah," I said appreciatively.

"Anytime Bells," she grinned at me.

I walked into the house and saw my dad on the couch. "I'm home dad," I announced.

He turned away from the TV to look at me. "Where's Jacob?" he asked. I shifted on my feet nervously and tried to hide my injured hand.

"He… umm left already," I replied uneasily.

"Weird," he commented. I laughed awkwardly.

"Yeah, well I'm going to sleep now," I told him.

"Alright, goodnight Bells," he said before kissing me on the forehead.

I tried to inconspicuously limp up the stairs. I finally made it to my bedroom and I collapsed onto the bed. I groaned when I realized I still had to get up to change. After I was finished with everything, I crawled back on my bed and stared at the ceiling.

_Where is he?_

I turned to my side and hugged a pillow to me. This is the first time in weeks where I have to sleep by myself. Jake would usually be here with me. _But not today._

I could feel the tears threatening to spill but I reined them in. I continued to roll on my bed, not being able to catch some sleep. I was spread lazily on the bed thinking about where Jake could possibly be. I got up from my laying position and started to grab my comforter, blanket and some pillows. I laid the comforter on my windowsill and then set up the pillows.

I tried to get myself comfortable and then turned my body so that I was facing the window. I looked into the forest selfishly hoping that Jake was somewhere out there looking at me. _Where are you?_

I couldn't help but flash back to some memories that we both had.

"_Really Bells, nothing's ever gonna change between you and me. Ever," he promised me with twinkling eyes._

"_Fine, I believe you," I finally agreed but I couldn't help myself when I added, "So even if you're being an arrogant and not trusting boyfriend, you're saying that you would still love me then?"_

"_Yep," he grinned and then he gave me a scrutinizing look, "Wait, what? You're confusing."_

_I chuckled and kissed him instead._

Maybe what he said was right. He couldn't have really left me. Could he?

No. He said he'd never leave me unless I told him specifically to and I hadn't. He just _assumed._ God, I hate that word. _Assumed._

I held my blanket up to my face and continued to stare outside, waiting patiently. It was so quiet in the room that I could hear my own heart beating. I jumped slightly when I heard footsteps on the stairs. I was silently hoping that it was Jake but then I realized that it was probably just Charlie.

_Where are you?_

"Jake, please," I whispered into the stillness of my room, feeling a cold tear slide down my cheek. I lifted my hand up and quickly wiped it away. It began to rain, which is typical for Forks, but for the first time, I actually enjoyed it. It helped me erase the moment of loneliness.

I watched the drops of rain sliding down the window with intent. I would sometimes even trace them. I enjoyed seeing how the drop would become even bigger when it joined another.

I pulled the blanket closing to my body as the temperature dropped. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep but still had no luck. Instead, I was pulled into another memory.

"_I don't love him anymore Jacob! He's my past and you're my future!" I shouted at a retreating Jacob. He turned around and clenched his fists._

"_Oh sure! You say that now but what happens when he's actually here. How do I know that you're just saying that to get me off your case? You still love him Bella. I know you do!" he snarled back at me._

_I stepped back in fear and whimpered at his glare._

"_Stop telling me what I feel, because you know nothing! The way things look, it's like you're pushing me to believe that I still love Edward so that you could get rid of me. Is that what you want? Because if it is, then I'm gone!" I yelled and was the one to walk away this time._

_Almost immediately, he had me pressed against his chest, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist and his face on the crook of my neck._

"_Don't. Please," he pleaded._

_I unwrapped his arms from my waist and turned to look at him. He looked so… defeated. I took a step forwards and his eyes flashed to mine. I grabbed his hands and looked up at him._

"_How many times do I have to tell you that I love you and only you now? Don't you trust me?"_

"_I trust you"_

It's sad to see how he could easily go back on that statement. He doesn't trust me. He didn't trust me then and he definitely did not trust me now.

_Where are you?_

I got up and leaned against the wall of the windowsill. For the first time since I got over Edward, I wrapped my arms around my knees, pulled it up to my chin, and sobbed. The thundering sound of the rain drowned out my pathetic sobs.

After calming down some, I scrambled to get the piece of paper that Alice had handed to me. I grabbed the phone and sat back at the windowsill.

I dialed the number and it only ringed once before someone answered it. "Bella?" Alice shrieked excitedly.

"Hey Alice," I tried to greet with the same enthusiasm but my voice was tired from sobbing.

"Bella?" she asked again, her tone now more concerned than anything. "Are you alright?"

"No, I'm not," I whispered, not able to find my voice as I was about to start crying again.

"You both still haven't talked?" she asked sadly. I was going to ask her how she knew but then realized that Edward probably told her about what happened.

"He ran away. I don't know where he is but I'm so scared Alice. I don't want to lose him. Not now. Not ever," I sobbed into the phone.

"Bella," she cooed, trying to comfort me.

"Is that Bella?" I heard Edward ask on the other line. "Give it to me!"

"Hello Edward," I sniffed.

"Are you alright, love?" he asked.

"Of course she's not alright you douchebag! The dog ran away because of you," she yelled at him.

"Can you guys stop fighting? Please," I pleaded.

"We're sorry," they both apologized.

"I don't even know if Jake will ever talk to me again but – " I immediately stopped talking as I saw Jake's figure outside of my home, his eyes trained on me.

"Bella?" Edward and Alice both asked.

"I… I'll call you guys again," I quickly said, hanging up before they could even reply. I looked again to see if it was really him. _He's really here._

I quickly wrapped a jacket around me and peaked out of my door. I heard Charlie's snores and realized it was safe enough to go. I ran as fast as I could down the stairs. Taking a deep breath, I turned the doorknob and opened my front door.

Jacob was still standing in the same spot he was in. I leaned against the doorframe and crossed my arms, just looking at him. Time stood still for a moment. His ever loving gaze didn't leave my face for a second. The rain was pouring down on him but he just stood there like he didn't care.

I took a step forward and he did the same. I took another and so did he. I looked up and saw that I was about to leave the shade that was blocking me from the rain. Realizing that I didn't care, I ran and flushed my body against him.

"Don't ever do that to me again!" I shouted at him as I pounded on his chest. I looked up to lock our eyes together. "Do you have any idea how scared I was? I didn't know where you were or how you were doing. You just left! I couldn't sleep without you. Don't you get that I love you? Is that so impossible to belie – "

He grabbed the back of my neck and crashed our lips together. This kiss wasn't like other kisses. It wasn't sweet and slow; it was rough and full of urgency. I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled on his hair angrily. He backed me up on the wall of my house and traced the curves of my body. His fingers slipped under my soaked shirt and I shivered at his touch.

After a few seconds his urgency disappeared and he just leaned his body against mine. "I'm so _fucking_ sorry," he whispered against my shoulder.

With my arms still wrapped out his neck, I began to play with his hair. "You always say you're sorry but the issue is still there. You _don't_ trust me," I stated.

He pulled back and gazed at me. He opened his mouth to speak but I gave him a pointed look. He sighed in defeat.

"Okay, I hadn't trusted you. I'm so sorry. But I do trust you. At least, I do now," he said pleadingly, desperate to get me to believe him.

"Are you sure you mean it this time?" I murmured, burying my face in his chest.

He pulled me against him again and I felt him nod. "I promise."

"He wasn't here for the reasons that you thought, you know," I told him.

"Huh?" he asked in confusion.

"Edward wasn't here to try to get back. He just wanted to see me and ask for forgiveness. Alice had well warned him that I was happy with you. He knew what to expect when he decided to come look for me. He respected my love for you. All he wanted was forgiveness. That was it and then he left," I explained.

"Wow, I am such a bastard," he muttered to himself.

I lifted my good hand and tilted his chin down so that he could look me in the eye.

"But your bastard-ishness is just another reason why I love you so much," I smiled softly at him. He leaned in and kissed me again.

"I love you Bella," he murmured.

"Love you too," I replied.

**I hope you guys liked this chapter, no matter how late it came.**

**Again, I'm sorry! I'll update as soon as I can!**


End file.
